Posts in category: Diplomacy

The city of St. John’s, located in Newfoundland, Canada, officially confirmed that two major cruise ships canceled their scheduled stops at the port on Tuesday, July 14, 2026.

These two vessels were the only ships on the schedule for the entire month of July, so it’s a major blow to the region’s economy.

St. John’s is the easternmost city in North America. Rough weather conditions can be a bit more extreme here. And in this case the weather was bad enough to force a last-minute change of plans for both Oceania Vista and the Crown Princess.

Why the Ships Scrapped the Visit

These decisions are not made lightly, and while they are always a disappointment to paying cruise passengers who often pick a sailing because of the itinerary, they also aren’t extremely rare.

The St. John’s Port Authority didn’t release specific details on the exact weather parameters at the harbor, but marine forecasts for the area might show why the captains chose safety over a difficult docking window.

Environment Canada (Canada’s official federal weather agency) issued strong wind warnings for the region, with gusts up to 55 km/h. Along with this wind would be choppy waves (up to 9 feet), and this makes for very difficult conditions for a large cruise ship.

This specific port also has a narrow harbor entrance (around 600ft wide), affectionately known as “The Narrows”. It can present a real challenge for large vessels when winds kick up, and the side of the ship acts like a large sail.

In the cruise industry, skipping a port to keep the passengers and crew safe is always the right answer, even if it means changing the itinerary.

Where the Ships Were Heading

These schedule changes disrupted two very different cruises:

• Oceania Vista: The ship was in the middle of a 14-day voyage from New York to Reykjavik, with planned stops in Halifax, Sydney, and Saint-Pierre and Miquelon before heading across the Atlantic. The ship is currently heading Northeast toward Iceland a day early.
• Crown Princess: This Princess Cruises ship was on a longer 59-day world cruise segment from London to Sydney. It had already stopped in the Shetland Islands and Iceland, and it was supposed to stop in Newfoundland before moving on to Corner Brook. As of right now, the ship’s plans to stop in Corner Brook are still intact and the ship should arrive on July 16.

The Local Economic Impact

When a cruise ship cancels a port day, especially at the last minute, the economic ripple effect hits the local community pretty substantially. The population of the port city is about 132,166 as of the last 2026 census.

Oceania Vista carries up to 1,321 passengers, while Crown Princess can accommodate about 3,592. That means roughly 4,900 cruise travelers, plus hundreds of crew members, will not be stepping off the ships to explore, shop, or take local tours in the downtown area.

What makes this sting even more is that the Oceania Vista and the Crown Princess were the only two cruise vessels scheduled to drop anchor in St. John’s for the entire month of July.

With both captains bypassing the port on the exact same day, the city’s cruise tourism traffic for the month has been completely zeroed out.

What Happens Next

The next few months will be a lot busier for St John’s though, with 5 ships scheduled for August, 12 in September and 7 in October. These are the busier months for the port, as cruisers sail in to check out the incredible foliage of the Northeast.

For the cruisers now spending an unexpected day at sea, the cruise lines handle itinerary notifications, port tax refunds, and schedule adjustments directly through their onboard teams and apps.

Port Canaveral, one of the busiest cruise ports in the world, is currently in the middle of a $175 million project that will greatly improve two of their cruise ship terminals.

The construction project at Terminals 5 & 6 is one of the most ambitious projects in the port’s history. Here is a look at a construction update on these two cruise terminals and when they will be completed.

Cruise Terminal 5

Cruise Terminal 5 is being expanded and will be nearly double in size when the project is completed. The terminal is going from 90,000 square feet to 170,000 square feet so it can accommodate some of the largest cruise ships sailing today.

The terminal is also getting a refreshed interior, a new look and feel, and expanded luggage laydown and passenger seating areas. The area for passenger security screening will also be larger than ever.

Materials used in the Cruise Terminal 5 project include 750 tons (1.5 million pounds) of steel, 650,000 linear feet of electrical wire (equal to 123 miles), 600,000 linear feet of communications cable (114 miles) and 225,000 linear feet of conduit (43 miles).

The expansion to Cruise Terminal 5 is expected to be completed in December 2026 and cost $78 million. 

Cruise Terminal 6

Cruise Terminal 6 is getting a 13-story parking garage that is the largest and most complex parking project in Port Canaveral’s history.

The garage will add 3,700 parking spaces, bringing the total number of available parking spaces at the port to nearly 17,500 across eight garages and surface lots.

It will feature eight extra-large elevators, and twin two-lane vehicle ramps will promote efficient traffic flow, and a connecting bridge will allow vehicle access to the adjacent Cruise Terminal 6 West garage. Port Canaveral told Cruise Fever that the garage is expected to open in early October.

In addition, a pedestrian bridge will also provide passengers with easy access to the entrance of Cruise Terminal 5.

The Cruise Terminal 5 renovation and Cruise Terminal 6 East garage construction are part of the Port Canaveral Advantage, a nearly $1 billion capital improvement program focused on expanding infrastructure, enhancing operational efficiency, and supporting growth across all areas of the Port over the next five years.

Capt. John Murray, Port Canaveral CEO, gave the following statement:

“Every investment we make is focused on ensuring the Port can continue to support the level of guest experience and operational efficiency our cruise partners expect from us, while readying ourselves to meet future business commitments. Projects like these intentionally align with a business strategy that underscores our role as an economic driver for our Port community, supporting growth and new business opportunities at the local and regional level.”

Construction for both projects is being led by Merritt Island, Fla.-based Ivey’s Construction. Port Canaveral has grown to be one of the leading drive-to markets in the U.S., with more than 80 percent of all guests driving to the port for cruises.

Seven of the world’s leading cruise lines currently sail from Port Canaveral. The 18 cruise ships that homeport there offer over 1,000 sailings that range from short weekend cruises to week-long sailings and beyond.

The Costa Concordia disaster is back on people’s minds thanks to a new Netflix documentary.

“Shipwrecked: Nightmare at Sea” revisits the 2012 tragedy off the coast of Italy, focusing on the stories of the passengers and the 32 people who tragically lost their lives.

Cruise Fever had just been in existence for about a year when the Costa Concordia tragedy hit the news. I still remember how shattering those images were when they took over about every news story in my feed.

While the documentary centers on the night of the wreck, it also left a lot of viewers wondering about what happened next. The operation to clean up the physical wreckage became a historic engineering project with a huge financial cost.

In fact, it was an engineering project like no other that had ever been done before, so workers had to get creative.

When everything was finished, the total bill to rotate, float, tow, and recycle the Costa Concordia reached about $2 billion.

To put that into perspective, the ship originally cost around $570 million to build in 2006. Cleaning up the wreck cost almost four times what it cost to construct the vessel in the first place.

$2 billion is enough to pay for a brand-new mega ship today.  Actually, the most expensive cruise ship ever built had roughly that same price tag.

Breaking Down the $2 Billion Disaster

How does a single cleanup operation balloon to the price of a 7,600-passenger cruise ship? It was not just a matter of hooking up some tow lines.

It was a monstrous, multi-year industrial campaign, and it was driven by legal, environmental, and moral obligations. For many reasons, this was not an easy job.

The total financial aspect of the disaster breaks down like this:

• The Salvage and Rotation: This cost about $1.2 billion. It was the most complex part of the process. Engineers had to build a massive underwater platform, attach giant metal boxes called caissons to the sides of the ship, slowly pull the 114,000-ton vessel upright, and then use those boxes to float the ship back up.
• Towing and Scraping: This cost around $200 million. Once upright, the ship was towed slowly to Genoa, Italy, where specialized teams spent years dismantling and recycling 350,000 tons of material.
• Victim and Passenger Compensation: Costa Cruises paid out around $95 million in total compensation to over 3,500 survivors, crew, and families of the deceased. Most surviving passengers who were not injured accepted a flat-rate deal of about $14,000 to cover lost baggage and trauma, along with refunds.
• Environmental Damage and Legal Fees: The remaining hundreds of millions of dollars went to settle environmental damage claims with the local government of Giglio Island and cover ongoing legal and administrative expenses.

The Delicate Process

When shipbuilders build a mega ship, they do it in a highly controlled dry-dock environment with gravity on their side. When salvagers had to deal with the Costa Concordia, they were dealing with an unpredictable steel beast resting dangerously on an underwater ledge.

This is where the massive budget came from. It was necessary to prevent a second disaster.

If the ship had slipped off the ledge, it would have plunged into deep water, breaking apart and spilling thousands of tons of fuel, sewage, and chemicals directly into a protected marine sanctuary.

The team could not just cut the ship up on-site. They had to treat the wreck like a delicate, heavily damaged structure, reinforcing it while it was submerged just to keep it from snapping in half during the rotation.

The Wreck vs. The Billion Dollar Club

So, what kind of ship does $2 billion buy you today?

In my article looking at the most expensive cruise ships ever built, we look at the category of ships that crossed the ten-figure threshold during construction.

If you look at that list, you will realize that the money spent on the Costa Concordia cleanup matches the price tag of the most expensive modern cruise ship budgets:

• Icon of the Seas (Royal Caribbean): The largest cruise ship class in the world cost roughly $2 billion to build. Subsequent ships in the class cost about the same.
• Symphony of the Seas (Royal Caribbean): Cost roughly $1.5 billion to build.
• Oasis of the Seas (Royal Caribbean): Cost roughly $1.3 billion to build.

In other words, the money required to clean up the Costa Concordia wreck could have fully paid for the build of Icon of the Seas.

But ultimately, the true price of the Costa Concordia disaster is not measurable in dollar terms. And it shows that when bravado meets a lack of judgment, a single careless decision can cost billions of dollars and change thousands of lives forever.

Celestyal Cruises has completed a rollout of adding tablets to every cabin in their fleet. They are also the first cruise line to add SuitePad devices to their stateroom accommodations.

Earlier this year, Celestyal Cruises added SuitePad tablets to Celestyal Journey. Now, they are also on Celestyal Discovery and help streamline onboard services to make the guest experience even better.

Through the tablets, passengers can do the following:

• Request cabin upgrades
• Make service requests
• Make purchases via the onboard shops
• Order room service
• Reserve tables at specialty restaurants

They can also access essential information through the tablets, including deck plans and onboard entertainment schedules, replacing printed schedules and flyers.

Both of Celestyal’s cruise ships are sailing in Europe with a heavy emphasis on cruises to the Greek Isles. The cruise line recently announced a new 14-night “Mediterranean Odyssey: Spain, Portugal & Morocco”sailing on Celestyal Discovery.

The cruise, which departs on November 28, 2026, will call at Malaga, Spain, with a late stay; Gibraltar; Casablanca, Morocco, with a late stay; Cadiz, Spain; Lisbon, Portugal, overnight; Tangier, Morocco; Valencia, Spain; Palma, Mallorca; Sète, France; and Barcelona (Tarragona), overnight. 

Janet Parton, VP of Marketing, PR and Customer Experience at Celestyal, said the following:

“Our partnership with SuitePad has been a great success on Celestyal Journey, and we’re pleased to now bring this technology to every guest on Celestyal Discovery. It’s a simple change, but one that gives travelers more convenience, more choice and more time to enjoy their cruise.”

A crew member from Princess Cruises’ Regal Princess has passed away after going overboard. The ship left Fort Lauderdale on Saturday, July 11, 2026, and was involved in an active search and rescue operation in the Caribbean off Cancun, Mexico, on Monday morning.

The incident took place on the morning of July 13, while the ship was sailing in waters off Cancun. Following search efforts, Princess Cruises confirmed the tragic outcome in an updated statement.

“Our heartfelt condolences go out to the crew’s family and friends during this difficult time. Grief support services are being offered to guests and crew members affected by this event.”

The cruise line also added, “Princess Cruises thanks the local maritime authorities and our colleagues from Carnival Jubilee who assisted in search and rescue efforts.”

Search Efforts Near Cancun

Regal Princess departed Port Everglades in Fort Lauderdale on Saturday, July 11, for a Western Caribbean cruise that includes a scheduled call in Cozumel.

Tracking data from sites like Cruise Globe showed the vessel’s movements during the incident, which were consistent with standard search-and-rescue patterns. Around 6:00 AM, the ship was only about 10-15 miles from Cozumel when it turned around and began heading Northeast to conduct the search.

The ship’s itinerary faced delays while the search and rescue efforts took place. The 7-day cruise on Regal Princess was scheduled to arrive in Belize on July 14, before visiting Carnival’s Isla Tropicale on July 15. The ship is set to sail back to Fort Lauderdale on July 18.

Standard Overboard Protocol

No further details regarding the crew member’s identity or the circumstances of the incident have been released.

When a person goes overboard, cruise ships immediately initiate emergency protocols, often broadcasting a “Code Oscar” over the public address system. The crew utilizes CCTV footage to pinpoint the time and location of the fall so the ship can return to that area and work directly with local maritime authorities and neighboring vessels.

Regal Princess, a Royal-class ship with a double capacity of 3,560 passengers, has been sailing Caribbean itineraries this summer.

Our thoughts are with the crew member’s loved ones and the entire ship’s team during this incredibly difficult time.

2026 has been a record-breaking year for the cruise industry, as more cruise ships than ever have scored perfect 100s during surprise health inspections in the first five months of the year.

So far, 38 cruise ships have aced their health inspection through the end of May. What makes this number even more impressive is that most years the cruise industry only sees 25-35 perfect 100s for the entire year.

The CDC’s Vessel Sanitation Program is responsible for inspecting cruise ships, and they have released inspection data through May 25, 2026. It normally takes four to eight weeks after an inspection for the report to be published on the CDC’s website. That’s why we don’t have any data for June or July yet.

Cruise lines that have shone so far in 2026 are Royal Caribbean, Carnival, Regent Seven Seas Cruise, and Margaritaville at Sea.

Royal Caribbean, the world’s largest cruise line, has led the way with seven ships scoring a perfect 100 so far. Carnival Cruise Line, the second-largest line, and Norwegian Cruise Line had five. Regent Seven Seas Cruises has had three, which represents half of their fleet. Finally, Margaritaville at Sea, a small cruise line with two ships in their fleet, has had both of their ships ace their health inspection.

Here is a look at every cruise line (in alphabetical order) and their ships that have aced their surprise health inspections by scoring a perfect 100.

Carnival Cruise Line

• Carnival Celebration
• Carnival Jubilee
• Carnival Legend
• Carnival Sunrise
• Carnival Breeze

Celebrity Cruises

• Celebrity Xcel
• Celebrity Apex
• Celebrity Beyond
• Celebrity Silhouette

Cunard

Disney Cruise Line

• Disney Dream
• Disney Magic
• Disney Treasure

Holland America Line

Margaritaville at Sea

• Margaritaville at Sea Islander
• Margaritaville at Sea Paradise

MSC Seascape

Norwegian Cruise Line

• Norwegian Viva
• Norwegian Aqua
• Norwegian Luna
• Norwegian Joy
• Norwegian Bliss

Oceania Cruises

• Oceania Riviera
• Oceania Allura

Regent Seven Seas Cruises

• Seven Seas Explorer
• Seven Seas Grandeur
• Seven Seas Splendor

Royal Caribbean

• Star of the Seas
• Explorer of the Seas
• Icon of the Seas
• Quantum of the Seas
• Vision of the Seas
• Enchantment of the Seas
• Grandeur of the Seas

Viking

Virgin Voyages

• Resilient Lady
• Valiant Lady

About Cruise Ship Inspections

All cruise ships that sail from a U.S. port or visit a U.S. port are subject to two unannounced health inspections each year. Cruise lines pay for each inspection, and results are posted on the CDC’s website for the public to view.

During the inspections, the following eight areas of cruise ships are inspected: Medical center, drinking water, galleys and dining rooms, swimming pools and hot tubs, housekeeping, pest and insect management, child activity centers, and HVAC systems.

A score of 86 or higher is required to pass. If a cruise ships fail and scores an 85 or below, the vessel will be reinspected soon after to ensure that corrective actions have fixed areas of the ship that failed.

After every inspection, even on ships that scored a perfect 100, cruise lines are required to file a Corrective Action Report that can be seen on the CDC’s website.

The Corrective Action Report addresses all health violations, even if they were minor and didn’t deduct a point from the ship’s score. For instance, on Disney Treasure’s February 17 inspection, one screw was missing from an anti-entrapment drain cover at Trixie’s on Deck 12. The screw was replaced during the inspection.

The lines along the sides of a cruise ship pier are bright yellow for a reason. And if cruise line workers see you cross it, they will be sure to tell you to step back. This is for your safety.

I know I’ve been yelled at a few times while trying to get a better angle for a picture of a cruise ship. And since then, I’ve written several stories about cruisers who have fallen off the pier.

On Monday, July 11, another passenger got too close to the edge and fell in, falling between the pier and Royal Caribbean’s Adventure of the Seas.

What Guests Saw

Two ships were docked at the cruise line’s private island in Perfect Day at CocoCay that day.

The passenger, who some witnesses of the scene claim was using a mobility scooter, went over the edge around 1:25 pm. The Oscar, Oscar, Oscar man overboard call sounded on Adventure of the Seas, letting everyone know there was an emergency on the port side.

Several fellow passengers captured video of the scene. Here is one of the clips from TikTok showing what happened:

@dogsfamily_love A man fell into the water between the port and one of the cruise ships #perfectdaycococay #royalcaribbeaninternationalcruise ♬ sonido original – Milisi

You can see part 2 of the video below.

How the Crew Responded

Much to their credit, the crew jumped into action right away. And at least one crew member actually went into the water to help the struggling passenger.

They used ropes and safety equipment, working for about 20 minutes until they got the passenger back onto the dock.

He was placed on a stretcher and taken aboard Wonder of the Seas, the other ship docked on the other side of the pier.

He appeared conscious during the rescue, and some comments on Tiktok from users claiming to be family said the man is ok.

Part 2 of Dramatic scene at CocoCay

@dogsfamily_love Watch when man gets pulled from the water next to a cruise ship #perfectdaycococay #royalcaribbeaninternationalcruise ♬ sonido original – Milisi

Another Recent Pier Incident

Just last month Cruise Fever reported on a story of a Carnival passenger who was hailed as a hero for jumping into the water to rescue an 84-year-old man who had also fallen off a pier.

In that incident, crew members pulled both men out of the water and transported the elderly passenger to the ship’s medical center.

The man’s rescuer was treated to a steak dinner and was on the ship with his wife as they celebrated their wedding anniversary.

We don’t know the full story behind how the man in CocoCay fell off the pier and if there really was a scooter involved any way. We’re just glad he seems alright and hope this story can help remind others to stay within the yellow lines when in port.

In the past, Royal Caribbean offered a complimentary pier tram to help with the long walk from the gangway to Arrival’s Plaza.  Back in October 2024, the tram service was discontinued for the general population, but recent reports still confirm that golf carts and accessible shuttles are still stationed directly at the ship’s gangway to assist travelers who have physical or mobility limitations

When it comes to walking along the pier, tt’s also important for families with little ones to keep the kiddos close when getting off the ship. The water can be gorgeous and mesmerizing but take those views and photos from behind the thick yellow line.

While cruise ships want their passengers (or in this case, “sailors”) to have a great vacation, they take rules about illegal substances very seriously.

A 35-year-old passenger from Spain found this out the hard way. On July 13, 2026, he was arrested and removed from Virgin Voyages’ Scarlet Lady and told he could not return.

The incident took place during a stop in Souda, Crete, where the ship’s private security team discovered cocaine and cannabis in the passenger’s possession.

According to news outlets in Greece, the ship’s security immediately contacted the Chania Port Authority when they made the discovery.  The moment the ship tied up at the pier, Hellenic Coast Guard officers boarded the vessel, searched the man, and took him into custody.

While a local Greek prosecutor ended up ordering his release shortly after the arrest, his cruise was over.

Under Greek Law, local courts treat minor possession strictly for personal use with fairly light penalties, often resulting in immediate release or even suspended sentences. But, while the passenger avoided a Greek prison, he couldn’t escape the cruise line’s rules.

Many cruisers falsely believe that because a ship is sailing in international waters or registered in a foreign country, drug laws don’t apply. In reality, the moment a vessel enters a country’s territorial waters or docks at a pier, you are fully subject to the laws of that nation.

Virgin Voyages refused to let him back on the ship for the remainder of the sailing, so he had to pay for his own travel back to Spain.

The prohibited items list on Virgin Voyages’ website clearly states that “all illegal drugs, non-prescribed controlled substances, medically prescribed marijuana or synthetic marijuana and CBD products, as well as certain uncontrolled substances wrongfully used to cause impairment…are prohibited.”

The arrest happened during a port of call that was not even on the original schedule for the 2,770-passenger Scarlet Lady, which was chartered by Atlantis Events for a month-long LGBTQ+ cruise. The ship only ended up in Crete after both Turkey and Egypt denied the vessel entry into their waters, forcing the detour.

There are only a couple days left on this sailing as this specific 10-night charter, which departed Athens on July 5, is scheduled to reach its final port in Trieste, Italy, on July 15, 2026.

If you have ever wondered what a limping impala feels like taking a sip of water from a crocodile’s favorite watering hole, just wait for the sales pitch at a cruise ship spa.

You’re floating in post-treatment heaven, muscles like butter, when the therapist smiles and asks: “Have you considered our $375 laser package?”

After a relaxing massage on a cruise ship, all you really want to do is take a nap in the solarium or back in your cozy cabin. Your mind is relaxed, looking at ocean views through those giant windows… and then — bam!

Suddenly, you’re not a relaxed cruiser anymore. You’re an injured impala limping over for a peaceful drink at the watering hole. Except, it turns out the hole is surrounded by hungry crocodiles wearing name tags and holding product brochures.

Too harsh? Maybe. But nothing ruins the moment for me like the pushy upsell mode that kicks in the moment the massage ends.

Welcome to the modern cruise ship spa experience on mainstream cruise lines.

Cruise Mode Equals Relaxation Mode for Me

There’s something magical that happens the moment I step onto a cruise ship. Along with that rush of excitement, there’s a sigh of relaxation that inevitably escapes.

It’s cruise mode. And for me, that means relaxation mode.

One of the first places I like to visit is the cruise ship’s spa area. I do this mainly because I want to get some pictures and videos of the area without anyone in it, and this is the best time to do it.

But I also love to check out the thermal suite as a potential getaway during a lazy afternoon during my cruise.

One thing I love more and more about the thermal suite on a cruise ship is that it’s mostly free of the pushy sales tactics that seem to dominate many of the treatments offered.

And I’m not alone on this.

A recent thread on Reddit about a cruise ship spa experience showed that this trend isn’t going away any time soon.

The original poster described the beautiful setting and lovely staff but also noted how the nonstop upselling (including stacked products and a $3,750 skin laser pitch) made the whole experience feel cheap.

“The people are also lovely! But the upselling is horrible and nonstop! I don’t need the upsell,” the cruiser stated.

Many comments to the post shared similar stories across different cruise lines, from guilt-trip comments to sudden attitude shifts when they said no.

Why the Upsells Happen (It’s Not Just Greed)

Most cruise ship spas are operated by third-party companies rather than the cruise lines themselves.

The biggest player is OneSpaWorld, which runs spas for many major cruise lines including Norwegian Cruise Line, Royal Caribbean, Virgin Voyages, Celebrity Cruises, Carnival Cruise Line, MSC Cruises, and others.

Their therapists often work on a commission basis. That means product sales and upsells (lasers, serums, supplements, acupuncture packages, etc.) are a big part of how they earn a living while working at sea.

With new wellness options like Botox, IV drips, red light therapy, and advanced skin treatments now available onboard, there’s simply more “weaponry” for the sales conversation.

From a business perspective, sure, it makes sense. Running a spa at sea is expensive, and these add-ons help keep the overall operation in the black.

Most therapists are kind and super knowledgeable about the products they offer. But when you’ve just melted into a puddle of relaxation, the shift from “namaste” to “ka-ching” feels more like you’re taking the ice bucket challenge.

The Guilt Trips and Forced Self-Consciousness

Going from relaxed to self-conscious isn’t an ideal experience.

A quick comment about “roughness,” fine lines, or dull skin can make you suddenly hyper-aware of every imperfection, turning a peaceful session into a makeover intervention.

Then come the guilt trips: “Don’t you want to take care of your husband’s sciatica?” or “This is really going to help you feel your best on vacation.”

It’s an effective sales technique. It must be, or it would have stopped a long time ago.

But I’ve seen it cut into the actual time of the massage itself. And if you just keep nodding your head in agreement because you want to be nice, the spa commercial just continues.

4 Ways to Shut Down the Cruise Spa Sales Pitch

The good news? You don’t have to avoid the spa entirely. Here are some polite but effective ways to keep the relaxation intact:

• Set expectations early. On the intake form, write clearly: “No product recommendations or additional services, please. Just the treatment today.” I’ve seen this work, but it’s not 100%.
• Be upfront but kind. I can’t stress this enough. Kindness has to be at the forefront. Before the treatment starts, say something like: “I’m really looking forward to the massage and want to stay in relaxation mode afterward. I’m not interested in any products today.” And then be sure to tip well.
• Use humor if it fits your style. When they start the skin critique, you can smile and say, “Actually, I like the way I look! No upgrades needed today.”
• Consider alternatives. Book the thermal suite pass instead of individual treatments. With all kinds of saunas, heated tile loungers, peaceful sounds, and even snow rooms on some ships, thermal suites can offer that relaxation you’re looking for.

On the thermal suite point, not every ship has a great one. In my experience, Norwegian Cruise Line and MSC Cruises have some of the best thermal suites in the mainstream cruise category.

Carnival has excellent Cloud 9 Spas on their newer Excel-class ships (like Jubilee and Celebration), featuring huge thalassotherapy pools. On the flip side, Royal Caribbean generally doesn’t put a big emphasis on thermal suites. Even their massive Oasis-class ships have surprisingly small, dark thermal zones tucked away inside the Vitality Spa.

Thermal suites on Viking ocean ships are second to none in my opinion, and they’re also included in the price of your cruise fare.

Back to the spa treatments: even within the same cruise line, not every massage and treatment experience is the same. Just know that for now, the sales pitch is part of the deal.

If you really want a massage, you can try to get one in port for less than half the cost of the ship. The quality of the experience will vary, but if you’re the type of person who hates saying no to a sales pitch, it’s probably your better option. Also, you should avoid time-sharing presentations (free tip).

Final Thoughts

I still love cruise spas. The facilities are beautiful, the views unbeatable (normally at the front of the ship), and a good therapist can melt stress away.

The impala-and-crocodiles analogy is mostly tongue-in-cheek.  But still, a little awareness and clear communication go a long way.

Here’s hoping the spas find a better balance between good business and preserving that precious post-massage relaxation mode. Because when they get it right, there’s really nothing better at sea.

If you want a relaxing cruise experience, here are my picks for the six best cruise lines for peace and quiet.