Hopefully, you’ll never need to visit the guest services desk during your sailing, but if you do, you might overhear some pretty bad complaints.
Often these are just because people are entitled, or downright deluded, but sometimes there’s also a genuinely terrible complaint that the guest is right to be complaining about.
So, let’s take a look at the worst complaints overheard at guest services…
1. There are gay people onboard!
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One guest was extremely unhappy to find out that there were gay men on the same cruise ship as his family, and felt like a refund of the entire cruise was justified.
If the guest is being honest here, then it’s hard to know who was more in the wrong – the guest for thinking that they should ask for a cruise without anyone gay onboard, or the booking agent they used who told them there wouldn’t be anyone gay on the ship!
Of course, guest services were exactly right here – they don’t ask for your sexuality and it’s not their business to disclose it to anyone else anyway.
The fact the guest spent two hours arguing his case is crazy, and definitely justifies this as the worst complaint heard on a ship.
Suggested read: The 15 Most Fun Gay & LGBTQ+ Cruises
2. It’s not fair that I’m losing sleep on this transatlantic cruise
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When you sail on a transatlantic cruise, you need to keep changing your watch as you cross each different time zone.
The guest in this instance couldn’t wrap their head around that fact, and was upset that they were ‘losing sleep’ with every hour they lost.
I’m sure that, if they flew across the Atlantic, they wouldn’t blink at having to move their watch forward a few hours in one go.
Top tip – On a cruise, sleep as long as you want – regardless of what time your watch says.
3. The entertainers’ outfits are wrinkled
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Some guests on a cruise ship seem to want to nitpick – to find anything that they can complain about, either because they’re hoping to get some compensation or just because they love to moan.
This complaint really seems to take things quite far though, with the couple saying that the entertainers’ outfits were wrinkled and worn.
If that’s what you’re noticing during the performances, maybe the onboard entertainment just isn’t to your taste.
4. Turn the ship around – I’ve lost $40 in Jamaica!
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Most cruise ships these days will have at least a couple of thousand guests onboard. Some have over 7,000. And yet there’s always somebody who forgets that, and thinks that the ship should be run just to their schedule.
Take this guest, who had $40 disappear from their wallet while in Jamaica. Not even on the cruise line’s excursions, either. And they wanted the ship to turn around so they could go get it back.
Who’s to say whether they really did suffer a crime, but even if they did, $40 isn’t enough to delay a ship by a few hours.
5. My toilet exploded!
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Here’s one of the complaints that is completely justified – it’s one of the worst complaints purely because it just sounds awful.
The guests had a problem with their cabin toilet – but not just backed up. It completely exploded, to the point of contaminating the clothes in the wardrobe…
Cruise ship plumbing can have some issues but not like this normally. Thankfully there are laundry services onboard most cruise ships, and you’d hope the guests were able to get their clothes cleaned quickly.
6. I asked for an ocean view, not a port view room!
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An ocean view room on a cruise ship is one with a window – either a porthole or a picture window – so you can enjoy some natural light and a view as you’re sailing.
But when you’re docked, half of the ship is going to be facing the port. Something that these guests forgot.
Or maybe they assumed that an ocean view cabin would always be facing the ocean… Either way, getting upset over this is pretty entitled behaviour. Just wait a few hours and you’ll have that view you want.
Suggested read: What Is The Best Side Of The Ship For An Alaska Cruise?
7. Where’s the water slide?
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Cruise ships aren’t built to a single template, and they aren’t all designed for the same demographic.
There are some that are aimed squarely at families, and that are packed with exciting features including water slides.
And there are some that are more aimed at adults who want a more refined, relaxing experience. Sans water slides.
Unfortunately, this guest didn’t do their research, but that’s not the fault of Holland America Line.
Always learn about the cruise line and ship before you book!
Read more: The Best Cruise Ships With Water Slides
8. There’s no way we drank that much!
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If you don’t pay for a drinks package on your cruise, then you’ll need to pay for each drink you enjoy.
What’s a little dangerous is that you don’t pay as you go. Instead, the drinks are charged to your account and you pay it off at the end of your cruise.
This can mean that, if you get a little bit tipsy and lose track of what you’re ordering, or how much, you might get a nasty shock on the last day.
However, you don’t then get to complain at guest services. Your decision to order those drinks is on you – stop shouting at the crew doing their jobs, and pay up.
9. There’s too much sunlight
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This is great proof that there are genuine complaints, and bad ones.
This guest complained about toilet troubles in their cabin – a perfectly reasonable complaint – and because there wasn’t an easy maintenance fix, they were moved to a different cabin which another guest had just vacated after their own complaints.
The reason? The room was getting too much sunlight.
There are always curtains you can close, but unfortunately, captains have to steer the ship towards the next destination and they can’t control the sun.
10. There are too many kids on this Disney cruise
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It’s true that cruising is a lot more family-friendly these days than it used to be, but there are still plenty of cruise lines and ships you can choose if you want a quieter, adults-only escape.
And that might be a good idea if you’re on a special trip, say your honeymoon.
But if you choose a Disney cruise for your getaway, you can’t really complain about the number of children onboard!
There’s nothing wrong with adults who love Disney, but you have to accept that it is a family-friendly brand. There will be children. Lots of them.
Suggested read: The 12 Best Adult-Only Cruises
11. I’ve not seen any whales on this cruise
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If you cruise to Alaska or select other parts of the world, you might get lucky and spot a whale from the ship. It’s an exciting experience and a great photo opportunity.
Yet it’s not guaranteed. And you certainly aren’t entitled to a full refund of your entire cruise if you don’t see a whale!
Even if you booked specific whale-watching excursions, it will be explained that there is only a chance. Don’t be that person who thinks they deserve a full week of free food, entertainment and board on a cruise ship just because a whale didn’t crest the waves.
12. My luggage hasn’t arrived after 13 days!
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The guests in this instance might have a valid complaint to make, but it’s still a little wild. They were overheard at guest services saying that their luggage hadn’t shown up, 13 days into a 15-day cruise.
This begs a few questions. Was it the first time they raised the problem? If so, what were they doing for the first 12 days?
Chances are, if they had complained already, the suitcases weren’t on a ship, and might’ve been lost by an airline, or left behind at port.
It’s not the absolute craziest complaint, but the timing of it definitely seems strange. You can always buy clothes and essentials in port (or even on the ship) if you are struggling.
13. Let me off the ship – my new wife can keep the room
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Another tale of a honeymoon gone wrong, though this one went very wrong when a guest complained and demanded her own room after arguing with her new husband.
While that wasn’t going to happen, the husband did at least resolve things by getting off the ship and letting his new wife enjoy the rest of their cruise.
As the person who told this story said, you have to wonder what happened when the guest returned home to her husband once the cruise was over.
At least she enjoyed the rest of her time on the ship.
14. My roommate is talking in their sleep
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Sometimes, cruise ship cabins can be a little noisy, especially if you’ve picked a bad location on the ship.
If something unusual is causing the noise, there’s a chance guest services could move you to another room, provided the ship isn’t sold out.
But if it’s the person you’re travelling with causing the noise, then that’s on you to resolve it.
A cruise line does not need to burden the cabin stewards with an extra room to clean because your partner or friend is talking in their sleep.
15. The microwave isn’t working
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We’ll end with a couple of confused complaints from guests who didn’t quite understand the features of their cabin, including this one.
A guest was complaining to the guest services team that they couldn’t get the microwave in their cabin to work to reheat their pizza.
If you’ve cruised before, you might be wondering – since when do cruise ship cabins come with a microwave?
Well, they don’t. It was a safe.
The pizza stayed cold, but it was the best-protected slice of pizza on the whole ship.
16. The fast-forward button isn’t working
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This person overheard someone complaining to the guest services team that there wasn’t a fast-forward button for the cruise cabin TV.
It’s not a problem with the remote – the TV just didn’t need a fast-forward button.
People are used to having complete control over their TV, but do you really need to complain about being unable to fast-forward parts of a movie you don’t want to watch?
Surely you’ll save time by not walking down to the guest services desk to complain. Just watch the movie.
Final Word
If you’re the kind of person who gets tickled by entitled guests, then maybe grab a drink on your next cruise and find a seat near the guest services desk.
It’s like people watching, but with added drama. And maybe you’ll end up with some stories of your own. If you do, make sure you leave a comment below.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
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