In a digital world where everything is trackable, live cruise ship tracking has finally caught up.
The Cruise Globe – a completely free, ad-free, fully 3D-enabled platform that’s redefining how cruise fans follow ships around the world.
Not only can you track ships in real time, but you can use this data to track your own cruise history in unprecendented detail.
Unlike older tracking tools, The Cruise Globe offers real-time positions and route mapping of every cruise ship globally, with a personalised and interactive experience never seen before.
And it’s all from the fantastic team behind Cruise Maps – which I want to tell you more about too.
A Leap Forward in Cruise Tracking
Over 4 million people use live cruise tracking apps each month. That number is only expected to grow, with 37 million passengers projected to cruise in 2025.
But until now, live ship tracking was functional at best – often clunky, ad-heavy, and imprecise. The Cruise Globe changes that.
Powered by AIS satellite data, users can now track cruise ships in real time with pinpoint accuracy.
Every vessel is visible on a 3D satellite-view map, complete with detailed stats like speed, number of passengers, current position, and anticipated routes.
Whether you’re watching a loved one’s journey or reminiscing about a past trip, The Cruise Globe brings cruising into the digital age.
But it’s not just about watching.
Users can catalogue their cruise history, log upcoming sailings, and even relive past journeys with detailed route replay on an interactive map. I love the idea of having a library of everywhere I’ve sailed!
And yes – it’s all free to use.
Already there are 45,000 people using The Cruise Globe and it’s continuing to grow rapidly, so make sure you check it out.
The Cruise Globe App Is Coming Soon
The Cruise Globe is already mobile-optimised, but the team is going one step further.
The team are aiming to launch a mobile app later this year, allowing users to carry their entire cruise history, live tracking, and future bookings in their pocket.
“Our aim is to make The Cruise Globe the single digital app for everyone’s cruising needs. The next logical step towards this was to show the live positions of every cruise ship.
“This is still entirely free-to-use and will also be part of our mobile app that we’re releasing later this summer. The whole cruise mapping experience including users’ upcoming cruise bookings will soon be available in their pocket, all in one place.”
Matthew Jones, co-founder of The Cruise Globe
From Print Maps to a Global Cruise Community
If The Cruise Globe sounds familiar, it might be because it’s the latest project from the creators of Cruise Maps – the world’s first personalised cruise mapping product.
Cruise Maps allows passengers to create bespoke prints of their journeys, featuring accurate port stops, ship routes, and travel statistics.
The idea was born from the minds of Matthew Jones and Will Ellison, two long-time friends with backgrounds in start-ups and naval architecture, respectively.
Together with cruise content creator Emma Le Teace (better known as Emma Cruises), they’ve turned their passion for ships and travel into a full-blown tech platform.
From beautifully printed keepsakes to a powerful digital platform with over 45,000 users in 100+ countries, the trio has built a fast-growing community of cruise enthusiasts.
The Cruise Globe has already logged over 235,000 sailings – and it’s just getting started.
Cruise Smarter, Share More
Whether you’re a seasoned cruiser, a data nerd, or someone who just wants a better way to track and share their travels, The Cruise Globe offers a new kind of cruise companion.
The platform even lets users compare cruise histories, track how many ports and ships they’ve visited, and share stats with friends or fellow passengers.
With ambitious plans to hit 100,000 users by year-end, the team is tapping into the competitive – and proudly nostalgic – spirit of cruise fans around the world.
Definitely make sure you check out The Cruise Globe, and take a look at Cruise Maps too to get some beautiful printed keepsakes of your sailings.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
Disney did it. Virgin did it. So what’s stopping other global brands from diving into the cruise world?
Imagine a McDonald’s cruise with floating drive-thrus, a Nike ship with a running track over the ocean, or a Coca-Cola voyage that’s one big fizzy pool party. It might sound far-fetched – but is it really?
In this fun article, we’re dreaming big with five brand–cruise line mashups that could actually work. Which one would you book first? Who knows… if enough of us ask, they might just make it happen.
1. McDonalds Cruise Line – McFloat
From the moment you catch sight of this majestic vessel, with its golden arches gleaming against the horizon, you know you’re not in for your typical cruise experience.
The ship, aptly named the “McFloat,” boasts an aesthetic that can only be described as “fast food chic,” complete with a supersized slide that looks suspiciously like a giant French fry. It’s a sight that promises fun, food, and a hint of the absurd.
Imagine lounging by a pool shaped like a giant Happy Meal, complete with a ketchup slide and mustard whirlpool.
The pool area on the McFloat is a splashy paradise where the sun always shines, the water is as sparkling as a freshly poured soda, and the poolside bar serves up McFlurry cocktails and Big Mac sliders faster than you can say “I’m lovin’ it.”
After a sun-soaked day, retreat to your cabin, where the comfort of McDonald’s meets the luxury of cruise accommodation.
The beds, as soft as freshly baked buns, are dressed in red and yellow linens, and the walls are adorned with art that pays homage to the greatest hits of the fast-food world.
And yes, the mini-fridge comes stocked with all your favourite dips because, at sea, every moment is a potential nugget moment.
Step into a dining experience that redefines “fast food” as “fancy food.” The McDonald’s Cruise Line’s premier restaurant serves up gourmet twists on classic menu items.
Picture a Filet-O-Fish, but with artisanal brioche and handcrafted aioli, or a deconstructed Big Mac served with a knife and fork. It’s a place where culinary elegance and playful nostalgia collide, all while offering stunning views of the ocean.
Thanks to Sail Away for the inspiration behind this cruise line.
2. BMW Cruise Line – C Series
First impressions matter, and the first BMW C Series ship doesn’t disappoint. With its sleek design that would make a sports car jealous, this ship cuts through waves like a hot knife through butter – or should we say, like a BMW cruising down the autobahn.
This pool is designed for those who appreciate the finer things in life, like a perfectly engineered backstroke or the art of doing absolutely nothing in style.
Retreating to your cabin doesn’t mean missing out on the luxury. With interiors inspired by BMW’s top-of-the-line vehicles, you’ll half expect your bed to rev up and take you for a spin.
And with smart technology at your fingertips, you can control everything from the lighting to the temperature, ensuring your cabin is as cool as the other side of the pillow.
Prepare your taste buds for a culinary journey where the dishes are as finely tuned as BMW engines. The menu, designed with precision and innovation, offers gourmet dishes that’ll make you want to take a photo faster than you can say “Michelin star.”
The ambience, inspired by luxury cars, means you’ll dine surrounded by elegance – just don’t try to buckle your seatbelt at the table.
3. Coca-Cola Cruise Line – S.S. Fizz
Welcome aboard the S.S. Fizz, Coca-Cola’s bubbliest venture yet, where every moment promises to pop with excitement and refreshment.
And yes, rumours are true – the horn does play the classic Coca-Cola jingle, ensuring you’re always in the right spirit as you sail.
Dive into the pop-themed pool where the water is as sparkling as a freshly opened Coke. The soda fountain jets might not spout actual Coca-Cola, but they’ll certainly add a fizz to your swim.
Poolside loungers in Coca-Cola red and white invite you to relax. And for those feeling adventurous, the poolside bar serves up Coca-Cola inspired cocktails – because what’s a vacation without a little mixology magic?
Your cabin on the S.S. Fizz is a cosy haven of nostalgia and modern comfort. With vintage Coca-Cola posters adorning the walls and a mini-fridge stocked to the brim with every Coca-Cola variant you could imagine (and perhaps some you couldn’t), you’ll wonder if you’ve sailed back in time.
This dining venue is a throwback to the classic American diners of the 1950s, complete with jukebox tunes and a menu that creatively infuses Coca-Cola into every dish.
From the Coca-Cola glazed ribs that’ll have you licking your fingers to the Coca-Cola chocolate cake that’s as rich as the company’s history, each bite is a reminder of why this brand captured the world’s heart. And yes, the waiters do roller skate to your table, adding a dash of delightful diner authenticity to your dining experience.
4. Nike Cruise Line – Swoosh of the Seas
Imagine stepping onto a vessel where every detail, from the hull to the top deck, is infused with the spirit of both competition and relaxation – a paradox only Nike could navigate with such flair.
As cruisers approach their Nike-themed floating palace, they’re greeted by the sleek design of the ship’s exterior, complete with a giant swoosh that seems to whisper, “Just Do It – embark on this cruise, that is.”
The Swoosh of the Seas pool deck is where the magic really happens. Sun loungers are decked out in Nike’s finest, ensuring you’re lounging in style and comfort.
The only challenge here is trying not to take the “Just Do It” mantra too seriously. No diving allowed.
Nike knows that even the most dedicated athletes need to rest, and the cabins are a testament to this philosophy. With bedding that feels like you’re sleeping on air (Max) and decor that subtly nods to Nike’s storied history, the rooms are a haven of comfort.
It’s where you can dream of victory, or just a really good breakfast, surrounded by the elegance of minimalism with a dash of motivational spirit.
The dining experience on board is nothing short of inspiring. Imagine sitting down to a meal where even the chairs encourage you to “eat wisely and hydrate.”
The menu, designed for those who like their cuisine with a side of wellness, features dishes that are both nutritious and delicious. It’s not just about fueling the body but about elevating the dining experience to a sport in itself.
5. Lego Cruise Line – The Brickliner
From the moment you step onto The Brickliner, you’ll feel like you’ve been shrunk down and dropped into a world where everything is made of Lego – except the water, thankfully. That’s still just water.
In the cabins, everything from the beds to the walls pays homage to the humble Lego brick. It’s all the fun of stepping on a Lego without any of the pain – unless you dive into bed too hard.
The pool, designed to look like it’s surrounded by giant Lego bricks, is both a swimmer’s dream and a foot’s worst nightmare – visually, at least.
Around the pool, you’ll find life-sized Lego minifigure lifeguards (don’t worry, there are real ones too), and a waterslide that guarantees you’ll make a splash, quite literally, into a world of fun.
Dining on the Lego cruise ship is an experience that tickles both the taste buds and the imagination. It’s a place where you half expect the food to snap together like Lego pieces. And yes, the chefs do wear hats that look like Lego chef hats, because of course they do.
6. Netflix Cruise Line – The Streamliner
The moment you spot The Streamliner sailing toward the horizon, with its sleek red-and-black hull and a giant glowing play button on the funnel, you know this isn’t your average holiday – it’s binge-watching, reimagined.
This floating entertainment paradise is a dream come true for film buffs and series addicts alike. The ship’s exterior is shaped like a modern cinema projector, with portholes styled like camera reels. And the ship horn? It plays the iconic “ba-dum” Netflix intro sound.
At the centre of the action is the Infinity Screen Pool Deck, where giant LED screens loop your favourite Netflix shows 24/7. Picture watching Stranger Things from a floating beanbag in a pool shaped like the ‘N’ logo, while sipping an “Eleven-tini” garnished with Eggo waffles.
Need to escape the sun (or that one mate who still hasn’t watched the end of Bridgerton)? Retreat to your cabin – a plush, cocoon-like haven designed for the ultimate in streaming luxury. Think memory-foam beds with built-in foot massagers, surround sound, blackout curtains, and a library of every Netflix original ever made. Oh, and a snack button that summons popcorn to your door in under five minutes.
Dim the lights, cue the intro – welcome to Now Streaming: Supper Club, where every dish is a scene-stealer and every drink deserves a spin-off.
Each night, the menu changes to spotlight a different Netflix favourite. Expect Squid Game calamari rings, truffle croissants worthy of Emily in Paris, or a Bridgerton garden soirée platter with floral cocktails and scandalous sweets. Sip a “Queen’s Gambit” Negroni while eyeing the Stranger Wings platter (served fiery red, naturally).
The setting? Cinematic. The vibes? Binge-worthy. And the decision? “One more cocktail or head to bed?” – spoiler: it’s always just one more.
7. Krispy Kreme Cruise Line – S.S. Sweet Escape
From the moment the S.S. Sweet Escape glides into view, its glossy, icing-white hull and sprinkle-covered funnel promise something truly special – a voyage dipped in pure joy and sugar. With a giant neon “Hot Now” sign glowing above the bridge, this floating bakery-on-the-sea is every dessert lover’s dream come true.
At the heart of the ship sits the Sprinkle Splash Zone—a candy-coloured pool deck straight from a doughnut-lover’s dream. The main pool is shaped like a giant pink-frosted doughnut, complete with rainbow sprinkles and a bubbling centre that’s perfect for splashing. Twin twisty slides spiral out of a towering Krispy Kreme crown, launching riders into the “glaze ring” below.
Retreat to your cabin and you’ll feel like you’ve checked into a boutique dessert lounge. The walls are decorated in warm caramel tones and pastel glaze hues, with doughnut art in gold frames. Plush bedding mimics Krispy Kreme boxes, and your memory-foam mattress is just as soft as the inside of a hot Original Glazed.
There’s a “Hot Now” switch by the bed — flick it, and a fresh box of donuts is delivered via your in-room donut chute. You’ll also find a pillow menu scented like classic Krispy Kreme favourites: cinnamon apple, strawberry glaze, or vanilla cream.
Step into Glaze & Graze, the ship’s flagship dining room, where every course is a creative twist on doughnut culture. For breakfast? Donut Benedict on maple-glazed rounds. Lunch? Sweet-and-savoury flatbreads with donut crusts. And dinner? Think bourbon-glazed doughnut sliders with truffle fries and caramelised onion rings.
For dessert (as if you weren’t already there), enjoy a build-your-own doughnut bar, daily deep-fried specials, and a theatrical “Donut Fireworks” finale – flambéed cinnamon churro puffs served tableside.
The Reality
Huge brands love to collaborate with cruise lines. On MSC Cruises ships, there are Lego-themed play areas in the kids’ club and Costa cruise ships have bright orange Aperol Spritz-themed bars as well as Nutella cafes.
But when it comes to building a whole new brand-themed cruise line, maybe not. Although it would be pretty cool, right?
Which brand would you like to see launch a cruise line? Let me know in the comments.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
Cruise ship memes are a source of joy, with funny jokes spreading across the internet and bringing smiles to the faces of those who love to cruise.
Many cruise memes contain ‘in jokes’ that you would only fully appreciate once you’ve been on your first cruise. However, there are also some memes that can be enjoyed by both regular cruisers and those who are considering a cruise for the first time.
In this post, I’ve gathered some of the best cruise memes on the internet. Enjoy!
What is a ‘meme’?
A meme is a funny image with text which is often copied and spread around the internet via social media.
The word ‘meme’ comes from the Greek word ‘mimema’, meaning imitated. This is because the same images are often used with different text to create different jokes.
The correct way to pronounce ‘meme’, according to the Oxford English Dictionary is ‘meem’. Not ‘mee mee’ or ‘may may’.
You’ll find all sorts of memes on the internet, including this hilarious list of cruise memes…
Memes About Cruise Addiction
Cruising is addictive, anyone who’s cruised more than a couple of times will vouch for that. The addictive nature of cruises has given rise to many funny cruise memes on the internet. Here are some of the best ones…
Memes About Cruise Ship Food
The abundance of delicious food served on cruise ships is another source of inspiration for funny cruise memes.
Many cruise memes about food poke fun at the weight gained during cruises (the average cruiser puts on five to seven pounds on a seven-night cruise). Memes also acknowledge the fact that it’s really difficult not to overeat with all the amazing food that’s on offer on a cruise.
Memes About Drinking on a Cruise
Along with eating, a popular pasttime for many cruisers is drinking, particularly if they have a cruise drinks package to take advantage of!
Anyone who’s cruised before will appreciate that the feeling of the ship rocking can be very similar to the feeling of being a little tipsy. One good thing about that is that any little stumbles can be blamed on the ocean, rather than the five cocktails you just downed.
Memes About Cruise Crew
Cruisers all love the crew, who go out of their way to make our vacations special. Some memes are aimed at passengers, whereas others are jokes that the crew themselves will find funny and share amongst each other.
Memes About Packing for a Cruise
It’s pretty common to have a love-hate relationship with packing for a cruise. Packing before you go can be fun, especially for those who love to book many months ahead and are very organised. Packing to leave the ship at the end of your cruise, however, is never as exciting.
Memes About Rough Seas
The weather is never guaranteed on a cruise and sometimes cruise ships have some big waves to contend with. This is the source of inspiration for many weather-related cruise memes.
Memes About Cruise Passengers
A cruiser is a great place to indulge in people watching and other passengers can be the source of much entertainment, whether they’re queing for something that you wouldn’t bother to line up for, or going somewherre you’d never step foot – like the gym!
Memes About Needing a Cruise
Memes About Going on a Cruise
Memes About Disembarkation
Funny Cruise Memes
Some of the best cruise memes aren’t about anything in particular, they’re just funny. Here are some of the best funny cruise memes I’ve found on the internet…
I hope that you’ve enjoyed looking at these memes. If you’d like to see cruise memes on a regular basis, then I’d recommend you join some of the Facebook groups such as the ‘Cruise Memes’ Facebook group.
If you’d like to make your own cruise memes, you can easily do these with an online meme generator such as MemeGenerator.net or imgflip.com.
If you enjoyed these cruise memes, then take a look at my list of the best cruise jokes for more giggles.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
There are a surprising number of cruise traditions that have already been abolished as cruise lines have modernised over the years.
Midnight buffets, skeet shooting off the back of the ship, the Baked Alaska parade… In most (but not all) cases, a lot of these traditions have been consigned to the cruise history books.
But what else should be thrown into the sea (not literally) when it comes to cruising tradition?
In a world where even the most average café offers free WiFi with your overpriced flat white, why are we still shelling out for patchy-at-best internet access at sea?
Yes, I know satellites aren’t cheap and we’re literally floating in the middle of the ocean, but come on – it’s 2025.
Many cruisers, especially first-timers, are shocked to find that staying connected can cost as much as an excursion.
Cruise lines – please just include it in the price or at least throw in basic access!
In all seriousness, I do know that WiFi at sea requires a more expensive satellite connection and so there is justification for a charge. But the price you end up paying can be sky-high, which is why I’m not surprised it was the most common ‘tradition’ people want binned.
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2. Formal or Elegant Nights
Ah, formal nights – the Marmite of cruising. Some people live for the chance to dress up, sip bubbly, and take a hundred photos on a staircase.
Others would rather not be judged for wearing smart-casual and enjoying dinner without packing half the contents of their wardrobe.
This one definitely splits opinion, and did so when I asked my Facebook fans. Almost as many people jumped to the defence of formal nights and don’t want it to go anywhere.
I get the appeal, and I’ll admit it can feel special, but maybe make it optional or have a designated ‘come as you are’ dining room for those of us who value comfort over cufflinks. Sometimes you don’t want to have to go hide in the buffet just because you’ve not packed your suits or dresses.
If I’m on a two-week cruise, I definitely don’t need four formal nights. Two is my absolute maximum.
3. Compulsory Gratuities
Here’s a spicy one.
Most of us want to tip fairly, but being automatically charged a daily fee with no real explanation of where it goes doesn’t always sit right. Many people believe in rewarding good service – but would rather do it directly.
Cruise lines argue that pooling tips supports all staff, not just front-of-house, which makes sense. There are a lot of people who work behind the scenes.
It’s why I don’t advocate for removing gratuities when you have the option, especially if it’s just because someone guest-facing has upset you.
Still, giving passengers more transparent choices and control over it might reduce the grumbling and increase actual generosity.
4. Shared Tables
For the extroverts, shared tables are a treat – new faces, interesting chats, possibly even holiday friendships.
For the introverts (or just those who fancy a quiet meal without small talk), they can be a nightmare.
While some love meeting fellow cruisers over dinner, plenty of us would rather not have to pretend we care about Colin’s stamp collection.
Let’s keep the option but make solo or couple tables more accessible without jumping through hoops. A lot of cruise lines have made this move already, but it should be easy to choose your dining preference in advance or by booking a table.
You shouldn’t need to go out of your way to pull the maître d’ aside to ask for a small table as a favour.
5. Set Dining Times
We don’t eat dinner at exactly 5.45pm at home, so why must we on a cruise?
The rigidity of set dining times often clashes with, you know, the whole holiday vibe. Freedom dining or ‘dine when you fancy’ options are increasingly popular for a reason – they fit better with excursions, poolside naps, or just the whim of the moment.
I’m not anti-structure, but I am anti- being rushed out of the hot tub for my dinner just because the clock says that I need to.
6. Art Auctions
No shade if you’ve picked up a painting or two, but many of us are quietly wondering: who actually enjoys cruise ship art auctions?
They often feel like a high-pressure sales pitch dressed up as a cultural event, and most of the art seems… well, it would look a bit weird on your wall.
I’d rather spend that hour sipping wine on deck than bidding on an overpriced seascape I’ll regret hanging next to the telly.
7. Photos With Officers
You’re enjoying your evening, maybe slightly sunburnt, cocktail in hand – and suddenly you’re lined up next to a stranger in epaulettes for a forced photo op.
It’s awkward, often unflattering, and let’s be honest, nobody really wants it. I’m sure the officers are lovely, but can we let them get on with running the ship instead of posing with tipsy guests and answering the same questions over and over?
8. Smoking Areas
This one’s divisive and I think a little unfair on those who do smoke, but more cruisers are calling for smoke-free ships – or at least fewer smoking zones.
It’s not just about health; it’s about walking through a haze of cigarette smoke to get to the buffet. There are designated areas, but the smoke doesn’t respect the signs.
I know smokers have rights too, but at the very least it might be time to rethink the locations, at least on some ships – and possibly add better ventilation while we’re at it?
Every cruise has that one person (or twenty) lamenting the golden age of cruising – when men wore tuxedos nightly, children were seen and not heard, and there wasn’t a burger bar in sight.
Nostalgia is fine, but times change. Modern cruises are more inclusive, flexible, and – dare I say it – fun for a wider variety of people.
Let’s stop moaning about what’s gone and embrace what’s next. The sea’s big enough for us all.
Final Word
Cruising has come a long way from lobster thermidor in the main dining room, shooting guns off the back of the ship and conga lines around the midnight buffet.
And while some traditions still hold charm for certain passengers, others are frankly overdue for retirement. The beauty of modern cruising is that it’s evolving to suit all sorts – from first-timers in hoodies to seasoned sailors in bow ties.
We won’t all agree on what belongs in the cruise history books (and that’s half the fun), but it’s clear that cruise lines are listening and adapting. That said, there’s still room for improvement – WiFi that doesn’t cost the moon, dining that fits real-life schedules, and less being hustled for a glossy photo you didn’t ask for.
Which tradition would you toss overboard?
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
They’re seemingly random, massive walls of water. If you’re nervous about cruising, then the knowledge that these mammoth waves exist might put you off.
But how much should you really be worried?
Rogue Waves Explained
A rogue wave is a wave that appears suddenly on the surface and is unusually large for that part of the ocean. While research is still being carried out into their cause, it’s believed to be a combination of high winds and strong currents causing smaller waves to merge.
Rogue waves are technically defined as “waves that are at least twice the significant wave height”.
The significant wave height is the average of the largest third of waves within a particular wave record. Put simply, rogue waves are twice as large as the average of the largest waves in a particular area.
That means that rogue waves might not always be the absolute tallest waves in the ocean, but they will be unusually large for the area and state of the sea at that time. And they can get to be pretty huge.
The Size of a Rogue Wave
Because the rogue wave definition is relative to the sea state, the official tallest rogue wave isn’t actually the tallest wave ever. Instead, scientists have decided that the title of ‘biggest rogue wave’ belongs to the wave which is biggest in comparison to the other waves nearby.
Officially, the tallest rogue wave recorded was a 58-foot tall wave off the coast of British Columbia in Canada, identified in 2020. That height put it at almost three times the height of the other waves around it. [Source]
There have been much taller waves recorded – indeed the first-ever officially recorded rogue wave was in 1995 off the coast of Norway and measured 84 feet. However, as that was ‘only’ twice the height of the surrounding waves at the time, it isn’t considered the largest rogue wave.
While official records have only been kept since 1995, evidence suggests many waves have reached heights of up to 120-feet in the past. [Source 1] [Source 2]
So to be clear – the 58-foot tall wave is not the largest wave, and there have been some much larger waves. It’s just that the 58-foot wave is officially recorded as the biggest above the average for the area.
Because of the ongoing research into the causes of rogue waves, and their formal documentation being relatively recent, it’s hard to say where they occur the most frequently.
In the 21st century, there have been recorded rogue waves in the Gulf of Mexico, the northern Pacific, the Mediterranean near Catalonia, and off the coast of Newfoundland in Canada.
Prior to this, there have been may more rogue waves recorded around the world too, before they were officially designated as such.
They seem to be mainly caused anywhere where there is a strong current running in the opposite direction of the tidal waves. But, that doesn’t line up with all of the examples – there seem to be multiple causes.
The MaxWave Project, led by a team at the Technical University of Berlin, have run studies that show that rogue waves appear to be formed when slow-moving waves are caught up by a series of faster waves moving at more than twice the speed of the slow ones. The waves combine and create much bigger waves.
Scientists are getting better at documenting rogue waves, and we’re learning that they’re not as rare as we thought, but they are still rare.
Sometimes, rogue waves can be confused for tsunamis or tidal waves, but in name only. All three are very distinct.
Let’s start with tidal waves – these are actually just the scientific name for the waves caused by the tide, resulting from the gravitational forces of the moon. They are, therefore, completely predictable since we can know when the moon is in its different phases.
Tsunamis have sometimes been called tidal waves in the past, but that is incorrect. A tsunami is a distinctive, one-off wave caused by a huge shift of water, usually as the result of an earthquake beneath the surface, causing the plates to move.
That huge swell of displaced water will then rush in a large movement. It will not be too noticeable out at sea because it’s just a raised water level – it doesn’t cause single large waves to form. So, tsunamis are rarely an issue to ships out at sea.
The problem is that the huge swell will continue to coastal areas, where it forms one giant wall of water which will break on the coastline.
Rogue waves are one-off, unpredictable waves, and while we don’t know the full causes yet, we know they aren’t related to land movements or the normal gravitational pull. As a single wave, they’re much more of a threat to ships at sea.
Rogue Waves Could Sink a Ship – But It’s Unlikely
A rogue wave could sink a ship, although most modern cruise ships are big enough to withstand the majority of smaller rogue waves, though not without damage.
Smaller ships are more at risk, but they are also more manoeuvrable so would stand a higher chance of being able to navigate out of the wave’s path.
Since rogue waves were officially recorded – beginning in 1995 – only a small number of ships have been struck by a rogue wave and then sunk.
One confirmed rogue wave incident occurred with the R/V Ballena, a 56-foot research vessel that capsized in 2000 and then broke apart against the rocky shore.
Other ships that have sunk due to stormy weather and large waves (though not necessarily official rogue waves) include:
The Harta Rimba – a 100-foot passenger ship with 332 people onboard
MV Cordigliera – a transport ship with 29 crew onboard
SS El Faro – a cargo ship that sank in hurricane conditions with 33 people onboard
There have been reports of rogue waves prior to their official recognition before 1995 that have sunk ships, including:
The wooden cutter Aenid was wrecked off the coast of New South Wales in 1865
Passenger ship SS Waratah disappeared in 1909 off the coast of Durban, South Africa with no wreckage found. It’s believed that a rogue wave capsized and sank the ship
US Navy cruiser USS Memphis was wrecked by three successive large waves in 1916, attributed to nearby hurricanes
The SS Edmund Fitzgerald, a lake freighter, sank during a storm in 1975, believed to be a result of the waves
Fishing boat Andrea Gail sank during the 1991 ‘perfect storm’, and was the subject of the 2000 movie starring George Clooney and Mark Wahlberg.
Cruise ships are generally built to handle most waves in the ocean – they can routinely sail through 10-15 feet waves without issues. Waves up to 50 feet typically won’t sink a ship, but can cause damage.
Waves up to 15 feet may not sound too big when compared to other rogue waves in this article, but picture standing on the shore and seeing a wave of 15 feet coming towards you. Doesn’t seem so small now, does it?
On a cruise ship, though, you would likely be absolutely fine, unless you suffered from seasickness. With 15 feet waves, you’re going to want to tap into any techniques you have for handling your sickness. This includes spending time on a low deck.
Rogue waves can be a lot higher, and cruise ships may take damage from them. Guests will be told to stay indoors and to move away from windows.
If a huge rogue wave was to break on a cruise ship, it could be a very severe incident.
The officers on a cruise ship are very experienced sailors and will know what to do in the event of a rogue wave. They will make sure to keep passengers safe and prevent as much damage as possible to the ship.
There have been huge super-tankers crippled and destroyed by the biggest rogue waves, but cruise ships are much less likely to sail into stormy waters, reducing the risk considerably.
This video shows what it could be like on board a cruise ship on the roughest seas…
As you can see from the amount of damage done to the fixtures and fittings and the potential for minor injuries from the debris, a situation like this is something that a cruise ship captain will certainly want to avoid!
How About Flipping a Ship?
It is highly unlikely that a wave could flip a cruise ship. They are built to be wide and have a heavy enough ballast on lower decks that they will survive rogue waves. It would also rely on the negligence of the crew to allow the ship to hit perfectly on the side.
The only way that a cruise ship would be able to be flipped over is if it took the wave hit perpendicular on the port or starboard side, along the beam. Most of the time, ships will aim to hit a wave bow-first.
And the thing about rogue waves is that they might be unpredictable and sudden, but you can hardly miss them. The job of the navigation crew is to be on the lookout for hazards such as rogue waves and to react to them.
In many cases they wouldn’t be caught off-guard by a huge wave suddenly coming for the ship. However, there may be times where a rogue wave can strike suddenly, with little time to react.
Modern cruise ships also have wonderfully advanced steering and propulsion methods that allow them to turn quickly. Providing the crew haven’t all fallen asleep or abandoned their posts, they will usually have time to react to a rogue wave and make sure the ship takes it as safely as possible.
That doesn’t mean that a rogue wave would leave a cruise ship completely untouched. There’s likely going to be some damage, depending on the height of the wave. But, she wouldn’t flip, and passengers would be generally safe, most of the time.
History of Cruise Ships & Rogue Waves
Cruise ships have been hit by rogue waves in the past, but it is not a common event. Since official records of rogue waves began in 1995, eight cruise ships have hit rogue waves.
All suffered damage, some reported injuries, and one passenger sadly died onboard the Viking Polaris in December 2022.
Hurtigruten’s MS Maud was hit by a rogue wave in December 2023. She suffered damage and was temporarily without power, but she was towed to safety and nobody was seriously hurt.
User “Sea & son” (@OnDeepWater) shared these dramatic clips on X/Twitter:
Another of the recent incidents involving a cruise ship being hit by a rogue wave was the case of the Viking Polaris in December 2022. A US woman was killed, and four other guests were injured when a rogue wave struck the ship when it was sailing towards Ushuaia on an Antarctic cruise.
The 62-year-old passenger sadly died as a result of being hit by broken glass when the wave smashed a window in her cabin during the storm. The other injured passengers suffered injuries that were not life-threatening.
Three of the other instances of rogue waves also happened in the South Atlantic and also involved small cruise ships. Both the Caledonian Star and the MS Bremen were hit by rogue waves in 2001. These were huge waves, measuring almost 100 feet tall.
Both ships suffered smashed windows on the bridge, along with losses to power and navigation controls. Neither ship reported any serious injuries, though, with the crew of the Bremen able to restore engine power. The Caledonian Star did have to limp back to port for repairs. These were serious incidents and the ships were lucky to not suffer injuries.
The third South-Atlantic incident occurred in March 2007 when the MS Prinsendam was hit by two 40-feet waves in a row. It happened near Cape Horn and resulted in around 40 injuries to passengers.
Of the larger cruise ships, Cunard’s Queen Elizabeth 2 was hit by a 90-foot tall rogue wave in 1995 caused by Hurricane Luis. She suffered minimal damage. There were a handful of injuries to those on board, but nothing believed to be too serious.
In another instance, NCL’s Norwegian Dawn was hit by three freak waves off the coast of Georgia in 2005, one of which was around 70 feet tall.
It reached the 10th deck of the ship, breaking two windows (caused by balcony railings breaking free) and flooding over 60 cabins, along with some public areas. There were a handful of injuries and the ship was able to sail to port without any further trouble for repairs to be made.
Remember that these are only since the official records of rogue waves began. It’s widely accepted that the Queen Mary was hit by a rogue wave in 1942 and that she suffered a lot of damage, and listed heavily.
Cruise Ships Would Typically Survive Rogue Waves
A cruise ship would usually survive if hit by a rogue wave. All modern instances of cruise ships encountering rogue waves have resulted in damage, but the ship hasn’t sunk.
The safety of passengers is always the priority of a cruise line, which is why only highly experienced crew are hired who know exactly what to do in any situation, even one as rare as a rogue wave.
The fact that cruise ships are so large and so well-built means that it would be difficult for a rogue wave to counter the ballast to the point of capsizing it, and they’re strong enough to not break apart as well under the duress of most rogue waves.
A rogue wave that was big enough potentially could do it, so while there are never any guarantees, it would be a true freak incident if one ever was to capsize due to a rogue wave.
And some rogue waves are extremely powerful and could cause severe enough damage to lead to the sinking of a ship, but again it would be exceptionally rare.
When I first published this guide, Captain Michael Lloyd, RD**, MNM, CMMar, FNI,YB, RNR wrote to me to add some more information, so I’ve updated the guide to reflect this. He has spent over 50 years at sea and was in command of various ships for 35 years, so his knowledge has been very valuable.
Captain Lloyd said that the size of cruise ships – especially some of the largest ships – does mean they’re more at risk, especially as they’re generally built for fair-weather conditions and designed to avoid stormy weather. And rogue waves can happen quickly, so the weather can’t always be avoided easily.
The height of some cruise ships does mean they’re more prone to listing, but to actually capsize one would be an exceptionally rare event.
Captain Lloyd has also written a novel about cruise ships.
Ships Lost to Rogue Waves
Most ships that have encountered a rogue wave have survived with minimal damage. There have been some incidents where ships are lost to rogue waves, but with cruise ships these are very minimal.
Smaller ships are lost to rogue waves more commonly, but it’s hard to give exact numbers of exactly how many are lost due specifically to rogue waves, since ‘regular’ stormy waters can also cause smaller ships and boats to sink.
The Bottom Line
Rogue waves are intimidating if you’re on a small boat, but cruise passengers shouldn’t worry too much, especially on larger cruise ships.
Yes, the largest waves may cause some damage, and potentially some injuries due to broken glass. But they’re such a freak occurrence that passengers need not let that rule their head – millions of passengers enjoy a cruise each year without incident.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
The rules at sea aren’t always the same as they are on land, and lots of people have managed to get themselves in trouble before when on a cruise.
If you don’t want to be placed under ‘cabin arrest’ (yes, that’s a thing) or even kicked off the ship, you need to make sure you don’t break the laws at sea, even if it’s something you’d normally be allowed to do on land.
So you need to make sure you’re aware of what’s permitted and what isn’t – or face the consequences…
1. Bringing Your Own Alcohol
Picture this: you’ve packed your favourite bottle of gin, dreaming of enjoying a cheeky G&T on your balcony while the sun sets over the open ocean.
P&O Cruises used to let you bring a bottle of spirits onboard, but changed their policy in 2024.
But as you board, security swoops in and snatches it away faster than you can say “cheers.” Most cruise lines have strict policies against bringing alcohol onboard. Some might let you bring a single bottle of wine or champagne, but hard liquor? It’s a no-go.
And if you try sneaking it in? Confiscated. Some lines may even kick you off the ship for breaking the rules!
At least, that’s what they say. It doesn’t tend to happen, though if you filled an entire suitcase full of spirits then I imagine they’d be looking at your real intent.
Save yourself the embarrassment – and the booze – by checking the cruise’s alcohol policy in advance. Make the most of your allowance but don’t push it.
2. Drinking If You’re Under 21 (Depending on Where You’re From)
If you’re used to legally drinking at 18 in the UK or other parts of the world, heading onto a cruise where the drinking age is 21 can feel like being grounded.
Most major cruise lines follow US regulations when sailing from the US, where the drinking age is 21. Some might allow 18-20 year-olds to drink with parental permission, and others may permit 18-year-olds to drink if you’re sailing around Europe, but this varies by line and itinerary.
Thinking of trying your luck at the bar? Think again. When the bartender scans your cruise card it will flag on the system that you’re underage so you have no chance.
CBD products are becoming more common and legal in many places on land, but that doesn’t mean you can freely bring them on a cruise ship.
Cruise lines have strict rules about CBD, including medicinal CBD products, due to the varying laws of the countries they visit. So yes, even if you have a prescription, it may be confiscated at embarkation.
Worse, you can even be banned. A Carnival passenger once tried to sneak CBD gummies onboard to help with their sleep, but they were caught, and subsequently banned for life from Carnival.
Check your cruise line’s policy carefully, and if in doubt, leave it at home. If you need it for medicinal reasons, the official advice is that you should consult your doctor to ask about alternatives for your cruise.
Ultimately, if your need is that great, you might have to think about whether the cruise is worth it…
There’s nothing quite like a cup of your own perfect brew, but that beloved travel kettle or coffee maker of yours? It’s a major fire hazard onboard.
Cruise ships have strict safety protocols, and personal electrical appliances are a big no.
If you pack one, expect it to be confiscated at embarkation.
Stick to the ship’s coffee stations instead. If you’re a real coffee connoisseur then there’s usually a posh café or barista onboard where you can get your fix.
And the good news is that if your cruise departs from the UK, or you’re sailing with a British cruise line, there’s a good chance you’ll find a kettle in your cabin anyway. After all, everyone knows how much us Brits value a cuppa in the morning!
You wouldn’t toss your rubbish out of a car window (I hope), so why would you chuck anything into the sea?
But you’d be amazed at how many passengers are tempted to toss everything from food scraps to plastic cups overboard.
Not only is it bad for the environment, but it’s also illegal. And I know – littering isn’t exactly legal on land, but even biodegradable stuff can get you a telling off when you’re at sea, which normally you might be OK with on land.
Guests have found themselves in big trouble for throwing cigarette butts into the sea. Something that they aregued was harmless, when in fact it’s a fire hazard.
The big one is ashes – generally you can scatter them freely on land, but on cruise ships you need special permission.
Modern ships are closely monitored, and getting caught could see you fined or even put off the ship. Want to watch something sink? Head to the pool’s diving competition.
7. Having Animals
Your furry friend might be your best travel buddy on land, but unless they’re a certified service animal, pets are strictly prohibited on most cruise ships.
That means no dogs, cats, parrots, or emotional support llamas. The exception? Cunard’s Queen Mary 2, which has special kennels for transatlantic crossings.
On land, especially in the United States, you may be legally allowed to carry a weapon if you have the right permits or licences. But on a cruise ship, those rights stop at the gangway.
Most cruise lines have strict zero-tolerance policies for weapons of any kind – firearms, tasers, pepper spray, and even certain knives.
Even if you have a licence to carry, you won’t be allowed to bring these items on board. Cruise lines prioritise safety, and security checks are thorough – any prohibited items will be confiscated, and you could even be denied boarding.
In 2024 a Carnival guest (why is it always Carnival?) shared videos of the handgun they managed to sneak onboard which, unsurprisingly, got them fast-tracked to a ban.
It used to be the case that guests were allowed to do skeet shooting off the top deck of cruise ships. But that’s not allowed any more. Of course! Weird that it was even a thing, but it was!
And One Thing Legal At Sea But Often Banned Ashore – Gambling
In some parts of the United States, gambling is heavily restricted or outright illegal. But take a short sail into international waters, and the casino doors swing open.
Cruise ships can legally operate casinos once they’re in international waters, and some cruise lines even offer short “casino cruises” that sail just far enough offshore for you to legally try your luck at the slots and tables.
If you’re craving a spin on the roulette wheel but live in a state where gambling is banned, cruising might be your answer.
Cruise ships have their own set of rules that might seem strict compared to what you’re used to on land.
Understanding these regulations before you set sail can save you from some pretty embarrassing – and potentially costly – mistakes.
After all, the last thing you want is to be the one arguing with security while everyone else is relaxing by the pool.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
We cruisers love sunshine, buffets… and a good dad joke at sea. Whether you’re counting down to embarkation or just dreaming of the Lido deck, these clean and clever cruise jokes are guaranteed to make you smile.
From ship puns to passenger punchlines, here are the funniest cruise-themed jokes that won’t make you walk the plank – but might just leave you giggling like you’ve had one too many cocktails.
1. Spring Break
A group of college kids went on a booze cruise for spring break. The ship sank and the young men escaped in a small lifeboat. They floated for several days, but nobody came to rescue them.
Eventually, delirious from a lack of fluid, one of the men noticed a bottle floating in the water. He reached over and picked it out. Suddenly, a genie emerged from the bottle with a loud whoosh.
“I am a genie and I can grant you one wish!” said the genie.
“That’s a no-brainer!” The frat boy said. “I wish the ocean were made of beer!”
The genie immediately granted the wish and then vanished,
“You idiot!” said the second kid. “Now we have to pee in the boat!”
2. Playing Cards
Q: Why couldn’t the cruisers play cards?
A: Because they were standing on the deck!
3. Castaway
A cruise ship passenger is looking out to sea when he sees a small island. On the island, he spots a thin, suntanned man with wild hair. He can see the man jumping up and down and waving.
The passenger turns around and sees the Captain, so he draws his attention to the man.
“Captain, what’s up with that guy?”
The Captain shrugs his shoulders.
“No idea. He’s always that happy when we sail past.”
4. Two Oceans
Q: What did one ocean say to the other ocean?
A: Nothing, it just waved.
5. The Nervous Cruiser
A very nervous first-time cruiser met the captain at the welcome reception.
“Do ships like this sink very often?” he asked.
“No,” said the captain. “Usually it’s just the once.”
6. Sunbathing And Reading
Two cruise passengers are lounging on sun beds, reading books. One notices that the other is reading a Che Guevara book.
The other passenger turns to him and asks
“Have you read Marx?”
“Yes”, he replied. “I think it’s from sitting on these deck chairs so long.”
7. The Booze Cruise
On the last night of the cruise, it’s discovered that there’s been a miscalculation with the food. Just before dinner, the captain announces over the loudspeaker…
“Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. I’m sorry to inform you that there are 2,000 passengers on board, but only enough food for 1,000 people. However, we do have plenty of drinks, so anyone who is willing to give up their meal will receive free drinks for the rest of the cruise.”
A few hours later, the captain makes another announcement…
“I apologise, but it appears that we have run out of alcohol. However, if anyone is hungry, we do still have 1,000 meals available.”
8. The Magician And The Parrot
A magician worked on a cruise ship, performing the same tricks each week for new passengers.
The captain’s pet parrot came to all the shows and figured out how the tricks worked. He began to shout out during the shows. “It’s up his sleeve”, and suchlike, spoiling the illusions.
The magician was annoyed but couldn’t do anything as the parrot belonged to the captain.
One night, the ship sank. The magician found himself stranded on a desert island, along with the parrot. They stared at each other with hatred for days, neither uttering a word.
Finally, after three days, the parrot couldn’t hold back any longer.
“Okay, I give up”, he said. “What did you do with the ship?”
9. The Cabin Steward
My cabin steward is amazing! I went to use the bathroom in the middle of the night and my bed has been made!
10. Scotch And Water
A lady goes to the bar on a cruise ship and asks for a Scotch with two drops of water.
She says: “I’m on this cruise to celebrate my 80th birthday and it’s today!”
“Congratulations!” says the bartender. “This one’s on me.”
As she finishes her drink, the woman to her right says, “I’d like to buy you a drink too”
“Thank you, ” says the lady. “I’ll have another Scotch with two drops of water”.
The man to her left says, “I’d like to buy you a birthday drink too”.
So the old lady orders yet another Scotch with two drops of water.
As the bartender gave her the drink, he asked the lady, “I’m so curious. Why the Scotch with only two drops of water?
The old woman replies, “Sonny, when you’re my age, you’ve learned how to hold your liquor. Holding your water, however, is a whole other issue!”
11. The New Hat
An old lady was standing on the top deck of a cruise ship, holding tightly onto her hat so that it wouldn’t blow off in the wind.
A gentleman approached her and said: “Excuse me. I don’t mean to be rude, but your dress is blowing up in the wind!”
“Yes, I know,” said the lady, “I need both hands to hold onto my hat.”
“But, madam, you’re also not wearing underwear and people can see everything!” said the gentleman.
The woman looked down, then back up at the man and replied, “Sir anything you see down there is 85 years old. I just bought this hat yesterday!”
12. The Language Class
I once took a Spanish class on a cruise ship. But I got lost at sí.
13. The Castaways
David was something of a ladies’ man, so when his cruise ship sank, and he found himself stranded on a desert island with six women, he couldn’t believe his luck!
The group agreed that each woman would have one night a week with the only man.
David threw himself into the arrangement with gusto. But, as the weeks stretched into months, he found himself looking forward to his day of rest more and more eagerly.
One afternoon, he was sitting on the beach, wishing for some more men to share his duties. Suddenly, he caught sight of a man waving from a life raft. David swam out, pulled the raft to shore, and did a little jig of happiness.
“You can’t believe how happy I am to see you,” he cried.
The new fellow eyed him up and down and said, “You’re a sight for sore eyes, too, you gorgeous thing!”
“Crap,” sighed David, “there go my Sundays.”
(Probably the safest of the dirty cruise ship jokes I could include!)
14. Which Sailors?
Q: Which sailors blow their noses most often?
A: The anchor chiefs.
15. Trapped In The Cabin
A couple boarded a cruise ship and went up to their cabin. Later, they called guest services and asked for someone to help them get out of their room.
“What seems to be the problem?” asked the man at the desk.
“We only have two doors,” said the lady in the cabin. “One is the bathroom and the other says ‘do not disturb.”
16. The Two Priests
Two priests take a cruise. They don’t want to stand out, so they decide to buy casual clothes. They’ve just hit the lido deck in t-shirts, shorts and sandals when they spot an attractive woman in a tiny bikini walking their way. As she walks past them, she politely says, “Good afternoon, fathers.”
The men are amazed because they can’t understand how the woman knew they were priests.
They decide to go to the onboard shops and buy even more casual clothes. They buy Hawaiian shirts, surfer shorts and dark sunglasses.
The next day, they hit the lido deck again in their wild new clothes and the same woman passes them in a string bikini. As she passes, she says, “How do you do, fathers?”
Well, the two priests are really confused, so one of them asks the woman, “Excuse me, we’re not ashamed of being priests, but how in the world did you know who we were?”
The woman replies, “Why, father, don’t you recognise me? I’m Sister Catherine from the convent!”
17. Fastest Cruise Ship
Do you have time for a joke about the world’s fastest cruise ship? Don’t worry, it’s a quick one-liner.
18. Rolex Below Decks
A rich guy took a cruise to a tropical island and decided to sunbathe on the beach. Wanting an even tan, he took off his luxury watch and slipped it into his pocket.
Back on board at the end of the day, he realised that his watch was gone. It must have fallen out of his pocket. Too embarrassed to admit he’d lost such an expensive item, he decided not to tell anyone.
A moment later, the Captain’s voice came on the loudspeaker. “Ladies and gentlemen, this is an announcement to the passenger who lost the Rolex Pearlmaster on the beach…the time is now 6:54 PM.”
19. Latest Cruise Ship Trend
Did you hear the latest trend is installing trampolines on cruise ships? Now everyone is jumping on board.
20. Sinking Cruise Ship
A cruise ship sinks in the middle of the sea and the cruise passengers manage to escape on lifeboats. A woman then asks the Captain, “How far is the closest land?”
“3 miles,” he answers.
“That’s not too bad, in which direction?” she asks.
The Captain replied, “Down.”
21. Dock Above The Water
Q: What keeps a dock floating above water?
A: Pier pressure.
22. Bankers Aweigh
Two bankers were the only survivors when their cruise ship sank. They were both clinging to a single life preserver. One banker, knowing that his colleague couldn’t swim, says, “I think I can make it to shore to get help. Can you float alone?”
The other banker replies, “How can you talk business at a time like this?”
23. Vegetables
Q: What vegetable isn’t allowed on cruise ships?
A: Leeks
My son loves this joke, he told it to Captain Robert Camby on our cruise on Arvia. The captain laughed!
24. Shower Trouble
The showers in the cruise cabins are so small. I just soap the walls and spin around a few times!
25. Emotional Baggage
I told my suitcase I wouldn’t be taking a cruise this year. Now I’m dealing with emotional baggage!
26. Cruise News
Breaking news: Passengers trapped on a cruise ship on the ocean for 4 days.
On the bright side, it’s kind of what they paid for.
27. Colour Clash
Q: Did you hear about the blue cruise ship that crashed into the red cruise ship?
A: The passengers were all marooned.
Summary
I hope you’ve enjoyed this list of the best cruise jokes. So many of the jokes about cruise ships seem to involve ships sinking. I suppose that a cruise is the start of many desert island jokes. I do like the cruise ship puns and jokes that aren’t accident-related, though!
If you love cruise ship humour, you’ll find that most cruise ships have comedy shows on board. There might be earlier shows that the whole family can enjoy and adult comedy shows after 10 pm.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
Today’s cruise ships aren’t just vessels – they’re floating cities, packed with waterparks, restaurants, theatres and more. But behind the glamour is a mind-blowing construction process that takes years, millions of man-hours, and billions of dollars.
In this post, we’ll take you behind the scenes to reveal exactly how long it takes to build a modern cruise ship, where they’re made, and just how much these mega-ships really cost.
How Long It Really Takes
From the keel-laying – considered to be the first real step in building a cruise ship – it generally takes between 12 and 18 months for a cruise ship to be built, depending on the size of the ship and the complexity.
Usually, cruise ships are announced much earlier, though, and the earlier ceremonies for either first revealing a ship or for the first steel cutting can happen years before the ship fully enters its build stage.
The Icon of the Seas is a great example – the largest ship in the world. She was first announced in 2016, but the keel-laying ceremony only took place in April 2022.
As one of Royal Caribbean’s newest ships, Icon of the Seas was due to be completed by the end of 2023, with sailings commencing in January 2024 and she remained on schedule. So, how long did it take to build Icon of the Seas, the largest ship in the world? Just 18 months, and she was ready to accept passengers within 20 months.
The Stages Of Building A Cruise Ship
It’s generally accepted that there are ten main stages in building a cruise ship. Here’s a look at each one in detail…
1. Order Placed
The very first step in a ship being built is the order being placed, which stands to reason. Cruise lines will normally make an announcement to the media about their new ship order, but there’ll be very few details revealed at this stage.
We’ll typically find out the class of the ship and the planned date of her launch, often three to six years away from the first announcement.
If the class is announced and it’s an existing class, we have some understanding of the size of the ship, but they are rarely identical twins, so it doesn’t guarantee anything.
Sometimes, cruise lines will announce the intended passenger capacity at this stage, too, but often, we don’t know much at all. Icon of the Seas was announced in 2016, but it was only in 2022 that we found out that the Icon Class would be larger than the Oasis Class, for example.
2. Steel-Cutting Ceremony
The second step in the process is the steel-cutting ceremony, and this is where the actual build technically starts. It’s when the first pieces of steel are cut for the ship, normally in a ceremony held with representatives of the cruise line at the senior management level.
By this point, we’ll normally have the announcement of the name of the ship, but not always. And the first bits of steel being cut don’t look like much at all – it’s very much a ceremony for show, to help build up the awareness of the impending ship launch.
The steel that’s cut will eventually be used in the ship, but only once the manufacturing process really gets underway.
3. Keel-Laying Ceremony
By the time we get to the keel-laying ceremony, we can say that the actual manufacturing process of the ship has truly begun.
The keel is the lowest part of the ship, and during this ceremony, it is laid into place in the dry dock where the ship is going to be put together using massive cranes.
Essentially, it’s putting the base layer down for the ship so that the rest of the ship can be built on top of it. There’s a lot of ceremony involved here, including the coin laying ceremony, where gold coins are either laid into the keel block to be collected later for welding somewhere around the ship, or they are welded in place now to the keel.
This ceremony will be carried out by the first Godmother of the ship, but they likely won’t be the same Godmother who christens the ship later. Often it’s someone from the shipyard, or from the cruise line, or one person from each.
With the keel laid, the ship will now be assembled in large blocks. All of the extra bits, like propellers and even the waterslides, will be added.
4. Float Out
By the time we get to the float out, the ship has literally started to take shape – it resembles a cruise ship from the outside, and many of the internal structures have been added, including the cabins, which are built elsewhere.
The float out is the point where the ship enters the water. The Godmother (likely the same one from the coin-laying ceremony) will smash a bottle of Champagne against the bow, and the dry dock will be flooded.
The ship will then be floated out of the yard to a new location where building work continues, freeing up the dry dock for the next ship. It’s at this stage that the rest of the ship is fitted out with the various furnishings and features.
5. Sea Trials
Once the framework of the ship is in place and it is ready, it will undergo sea trials. Various crew will join shipyard officials, insurance company reps and other safety inspectors while the ship makes its first trips out onto the ocean.
The ship won’t be finished yet – there’s still a fair amount of work to be done – but this is the chance for the safety of the ship to be checked, and for the crew to get used to how this brand new ship handles.
No two ships are the same, so this is important – and various manoeuvres will be carried out so that the crew understands how quick she is and how easy she is to turn.
With the sea trials complete, the ship returns to the shipyard for the last parts of the build and furnishing.
6. Handover Ceremony
The handover ceremony is where the ship is presented to the cruise line and signed over from the shipyard. Again, there’ll normally be a fair amount of pomp around this, but the ship is still far from finished, despite how she may look.
From the outside, she will look complete, but things like soft furnishings and, more importantly, supplies won’t be on board. So at this stage, the crew will likely join the ship for the first time, and the ship will brace itself for its first actual sailing.
7. Shakedown Voyage
The very first sailing of a ship is the shakedown voyage. This is basically taking the ship for a run-out to see how she works and to get the crew acclimated to her. A lot of the training will take place on this sailing.
The cruise line might use this as the first opportunity to get travel agents and members of the media on board to promote the ship, as well as offer places to key people who were involved in the build, such as architects, engineers, and interior designers.
8. Inaugural Voyage
The inaugural voyage is not an ever-present step, and it’s sometimes combined with the shakedown voyage. This is considered to be the first sailing with passengers, but not paying guests. This will be the main one to host travel agents, media and sometimes even celebrity guests too. I was lucky enough to be invited to the Inaugural sailing of Disney Wish.
The point of this sailing is to generate a bit of publicity and to help sell the ship. Travel agents often get invited so that they can do a better job of talking about the ship to potential passengers in future.
Between the shakedown voyage and the inaugural voyage, the ship will be sailed to the port where her christening ceremony will take place.
9. Christening Ceremony
This is probably the most famous of the various ceremonies involved in the building of a ship. The christening ceremony will take place either at the home port of the ship, or at a convenient port elsewhere – it’s not uncommon for the christening of US-based ships to happen in Southampton.
Here, the Godmother (this time the ‘well-known’ one) will formally christen the ship by smashing a bottle of Champagne against the bow – though it’s all done using wires and buttons these days. You want to make sure the bottle breaks; otherwise, it’s bad luck!
There may be other special guests too, and the whole ceremony will be one big welcoming party for the ship. There’ll be a lot of media present, especially for bigger ships.
10. Maiden Voyage
The last stage is the maiden voyage – either the first sailing of a regular itinerary or often a transatlantic cruise where the ship will travel from Southampton or another European port to its home base in the US.
The key difference with this sailing is that it will be the first to accept paying customers, so everything has to be perfect in theory, although there will no doubt be a couple of minor teething problems, which hopefully won’t even be noticed by guests.
How Many Man-Hours It Takes To Build A Cruise Ship
It takes many man-hours to build a cruise ship, but there is no typical average because it depends on the size and complexity of the ship involved. Expect it to take somewhere between 500,000 and 2.5 million man-hours, depending on the ship.
The actual number of man-hours involved is never revealed, neither by the cruise lines nor the shipyards. But it would be reasonable to expect that typically 1,000 to 2,000 crew would be working on building a ship at any one time, although sometimes that may be much fewer once parts have been assembled.
So, take an average of 750 workers across an 18-month period – if they worked 8-hour shifts for 300 days in total, that would be 1.8 million man-hours.
These figures are a little speculative, but they’ll be in the right ballpark.
Where Cruise Ships Are Built
Cruise ships are built at dedicated shipyards – massive factories equipped with all the necessary tools and space for a ship to be built, including dry docks, cranes for lifting sections of the ships into place, and welding equipment. There are four main cruise shipyards in the world.
Not all parts of a cruise ship are built at a shipyard, though. Some elements, such as the cabins, may be built on a production line elsewhere and transported to the shipyard to be put into place. The shipyard is where the main sections of the ship are put together, rather than where each individual element is manufactured.
The four shipyards in the world capable of building cruise ships are:
Meyer Werft – based in Germany and builders of ships such as P&O Cruises’ Iona, Disney Wish, and Odyssey of the Seas
Meyer Turku – owned by Meyer Werft and based in Turkey, building the Icon of the Seas
Chantiers de l’Antique – a French shipyard and builders of Wonder of the Seas, Celebrity Beyond and MSC Virtuosa
Fincantieri – based in Italy and the builders of MSC Seaview, Carnival Horizon and Seven Seas Explorer among others
The Cost Of Building A Cruise Ship
The cost to build a cruise ship varies depending on the size and complexity, but the average for modern ships is around $500 million or £380 million. The most expensive ships in the world were the first Oasis-class ships for Royal Caribbean, which cost around $1.3 billion.
Later Oasis-class ships cost slightly less than this, due to the changing costs involved in the manufacturing process and the fact that some of the design stages were no longer needed – many features had already been tried and tested on other ships by that point.
Shipbuilding is a massive industry both in terms of the number of hours involved and the finances, but the fact that ships are constantly being ordered shows that the demand for these ships definitely exists.
As you’d expect, building a cruise ship is not something that happens even close to overnight. Before the first steps are really taken with the actual building process, there are months and sometimes years of planning involved.
Most of us don’t need to worry about it, though – we just get all the benefits of the finished ship at the end. And you can generally book a new cruise ship around 12 to 18 months before it sets sail, so you aren’t left desperate in anticipation for too long.
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Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
Two of the world’s best-known river cruise brands – Scenic and Emerald – are now making serious waves at sea. But while their ocean ships may look equally sleek and stylish, the onboard experience couldn’t be more different.
In this guest post, cruise expert Jenny from Travel Counsellors breaks down what really sets these two luxury cruise lines apart – and which one might be your perfect match.
Choosing Between Scenic And Emerald
Scenic Luxury Ocean Cruises and Emerald Cruises are sister brands owned by the Scenic Group. In my first Scenic and Emerald blog, I compared their river cruise brands.
In this article, we’ll look at the similarities and differences between their cruise brands to help you make an informed choice for your next adventure. See the comparison table below.
Scenic Vs Emerald: Comparison Table
This table shows some of the similarities and differences between the brands:
Features
Scenic (Ultra-Luxury)
Emerald (Luxury)
Ships
Scenic Eclipse and Scenic Eclipse II
Emerald Azzurra, Emerald Sakara and Emerald Kaia
Years built
2018 / 2023
2022 / 2023 / Launching in April 2026
Guests
228 / 232
100 / 100 / 128
Itineraries
Antarctica, Arctic & Northern Europe, Americas & the Caribbean, Europe & the Mediterranean, Australia, New Zealand & the South Pacific
Mediterranean & Adriatic Sea, Caribbean & Central America, Red Sea & Indian Ocean
Butler service
Yes, for every guest
No, but 76 crew to 100 guests means service is highly personal
Meals
All onboard meals included. Up to 10 culinary experiences from casual to fine dining
All on-board meals are included in 3 dining areas: La Cucina Dining, La Cucina Terrace and Aqua Pool Café
Drinks
Complimentary beverages all day (select rare and vintage options not included)
Complimentary wine, beer and soft drinks with lunch and dinner. Additional drinks package available.
Excursions
All included
Many included – optional in-depth guides available at extra cost
Equipment
Onboard Swarovski telescopes and in-suite binoculars. Watersports equipment including kayaks, paddleboards, Tiwal sailing boat and water skiing
Marina Platform and water toys including stand-up paddleboards, kayaks and SEABOBs
Fitness and wellness
Scandinavian-inspired outdoor Vitality Pools and cabanas. Large, oval-shaped Vitality Pool with swim jets allowing guests to swim ‘laps’ (Eclipse II) Indulgent Senses Spa (extra cost). Gym, yoga and pilates studio
Infinity pool, Elements Spa and Wellness Centre (extra cost). State-of-the-art infrared sauna. Well-equipped gym. Yoga and pilates on the Observation Deck
Bicycles onboard
Complimentary e-bikes
10 award-winning Gocycle electric bicycles
Gratuities
All gratuities included
All gratuities included
Wi-Fi
Complimentary Wi-Fi
Complimentary Wi-Fi
All the information is correct to the best of my knowledge. Please get in touch if you would like me to check any specific details.
Scenic Vs Emerald According To The Owner
Scenic and Emerald offer quite different cruise options to travellers, though they are both owned by the same company – Scenic Luxury Cruises and Tours.
I asked the owner of the company, Glen, to explain his thoughts about the two brands. He said:
“Scenic redefines all-inclusive luxury, while Scenic Eclipse marries 6-star ultra-luxury with unparalleled global navigation and discovery, with two onboard helicopters and a 6-seater submersible for unrivalled exploration. With all Scenic voyages, guests can leave their wallet at home as the luxuries you’d expect to pay extra for are included. Enjoy exceptional service, the finest dining experiences, and travel in style to all five continents of the globe in truly all-inclusive luxury. “
“The Emerald Cruises brand offers guests contemporary luxury and independence with the freedom to explore off the beaten path. Our brand new yachts – Azzurra and Sakkara allow our guests to enjoy a small ship experience, where they can embrace the yacht lifestyle, enjoying incredible onboard dining and wellness, with no more than 100 guests to destinations including the Caribbean, the Red Sea and the Seychelles.”
Discovery Luxury Yachts Vs Ultra-Luxury Yachts
Both Scenic and Emerald yachts are stunning, five-star ships. Scenic offers an ultra-luxury, all-inclusive option, while Emerald offers a luxury experience with slightly less included.
Scenic Eclipse and Eclipse II have a Polar Class 6 rating with a strengthened hull and customised stabilisers, ensuring they can sail into polar regions with ease. Their ships have been designed with discovery in mind.
Guests have the opportunity to see above and below the horizon, with two onboard helicopters, and a custom-built submarine, available on both vessels (at extra cost).
The small size of Emerald’s yachts means that they can explore coastal areas and ports that larger yachts and ocean ships are too big to reach. Their focus is on providing an incredible, luxury, small yacht experience. They don’t sail to the Polar regions.
Emerald’s yachts offer some incredible experiences, but Scenic is a step up, with even more impressive service and almost everything onboard included in your fare.
Conclusion
Both Scenic and Emerald Yachts have all the amenities of a world-class hotel and provide a haven of relaxation and innovation.
With both brands, you’ll experience fantastic service and attention to detail. In the words of owner, Glen Moroney:
“The guest experience is at the heart of everything we do, and our inspiration is always to offer our guests unforgettable experiences, incredible service and lead the way in delivering innovative and sustainable cruising programmes and building ships that set the benchmark in luxury ocean cruising”.
Find Your Perfect Cruise:
Jenny can help you find the perfect cruise including the Scenic and Emerald Yachts.
Not all cruise passengers know how to behave when they’re sailing. Or some do, but they don’t care, and they will act however they want to.
Those people are awful, and you don’t want to be lumped in with them. Soon enough, you’ll be getting a reputation onboard and you might even be called out all over social media groups for your bad behaviour.
There are several common ‘sins’ of cruising – so here’s how you can avoid them and rise above to be a better shipmate.
1. Envy – Suite Jealousy and Status Sulking
It’s easy to look at the VIP guests with their private sun decks, fast-track embarkation and passes for the first tender boats and feel a bit green. But letting envy get the better of you can turn your holiday sour.
Trying to sneak into reserved lounges, moaning about how it’s “not fair,” or obsessively comparing cabin sizes won’t magically give you a balcony. It’ll just ruin your mood.
There will always be someone cruising with more perks – focus on what you get. Even the most basic cabin still comes with sunsets, sea breezes and someone bringing you dessert.
Honourable mentions
Sneaking into suite spaces you shouldn’t be in – want to enjoy the private suite sundeck? Book a suite. Don’t be so greedy that you feel you’re entitled to it when you’ve only booked an Inside.
Mocking people with premium perks under the guise of humour – “must be nice to get turn up late and get the best seats in the theatre” isn’t as casual as you think.
Rolling your eyes at suite passengers – their cruise isn’t affecting yours unless you let it.
2. Greed – Lounger Hogging
There’s a special place in cruise hell for the chair hogs. You know the type – towels down at dawn, five loungers claimed for a family who won’t appear until noon, all guarded by a single paperback and a pair of sunglasses.
Greed like this doesn’t just apply poolside. You’ll also find it in the theatre when people “reserve” whole rows with jumpers and bags, or even in the buffet where people will swipe bigger tables even if they’re just a couple, because they ‘need’ more space.
Cruising works best when everyone remembers they’re sharing. If you’re not actively using a space, don’t claim it. Simple.
And if you see someone looking lost and standing awkwardly while you’ve been saving the seat next to you for an hour? Invite them to sit down. It’s amazing what can happen when people stop treating every deck chair like a personal inheritance.
Honourable mentions
Grabbing the last pizza slice even if you aren’t that hungry – there’ll always be more on the way, so why not let someone else take that one if you aren’t sure you’ll need it?
Refusing to share elevator space –nobody wants to be in a cramped elevator, but it’s better than forcing someone else to wait when you could clearly bunch up a bit. Don’t be greedy over floor space. Get cosy – it won’t be for long.
3. Gluttony – Buffet Overload
Cruise ships and food go hand in hand – but some people take it a step too far.
Mountains of bacon, three croissants, a mid-morning ice cream, lunch, two poolside pizzas, afternoon tea, a pre-dinner canapé or two… and suddenly, the main event – dinner – feels like a chore instead of a treat.
Gluttony isn’t just about overindulgence. It’s about waste. Piling up a plate at the buffet only to leave most of it untouched is both inconsiderate and, frankly, unnecessary.
Food is always available on a cruise. There’s no need to hoard or over-order. A little restraint will leave you feeling better and enjoying your meals more – especially if you’ve splurged on a specialty restaurant.
Food waste is also one of the biggest issues on cruises when it comes to environmental concerns, so don’t be the person that contributes unfairly.
Honourable mentions
Over-snacking throughout the day – this is totally up to you, but turning up to dinner already stuffed will leave you disappointed and can cause issues with your travelling party – they don’t want you just to watch them eating while you’re sat nursing a full stomach.
Ordering room service you’re not actually going to eat – it’s not just wasteful, it’s disrespectful to the crew who have to prep and deliver it.
Taking three of every dessert “just to try” – not so much of an issue if you’re actually eating them all, but don’t abandon them.
Treating every food venue as a personal eating challenge – it’s a cruise, not an eating contest.
4. Pride – The Bragging Cruiser
Some passengers treat the ship like a floating leaderboard — who’s done the most cruises, scored the fanciest cabin, or got upgraded thanks to their loyalty points and “connections.”
They can’t help but tell you how much they paid (or didn’t), how their last ship was so much better, or how they’ve “been to this port loads of times already.”
There’s nothing wrong with being proud of your travels, but rubbing it in other guests’ faces just makes you a bore.
Swap stories, share tips, but maybe don’t turn every conversation into a humblebrag monologue.
Honourable mentions
Flashing your loyalty card in every conversation – no one’s awarding medals at the pool bar.
Dropping “suite life” references every chance you get – people don’t need to know how many square feet your bathroom has.
Mocking someone’s inside cabin – if your joy requires belittling someone else’s setup, it’s not as impressive as you think.
Correcting newer cruisers like it’s a job – offering tips is nice, being a know-it-all isn’t.
5. Lust – Balcony Mischief and PDA Overkill
Romance at sea is lovely. Full-blown lust? Maybe keep it behind closed doors.
Balcony escapades may seem private, but the crew can see everything.
Public displays of affection that belong in a rom-com bedroom scene are more cringe than cute.
The same goes for flirtation that crosses the line — especially with crew members who, by the way, are working under strict codes of conduct.
You’re not starring in your own cruise romance drama. Keep things classy.
Honourable mentions
Late-night noise from neighbouring cabins – if your romantic evening can be heard three doors down, you might want to turn the volume down (and maybe the playlist up).
Over-the-top PDA in the hot tub – there are families around, and no one wants to sit in someone else’s make-out zone.
Unsolicited touching or innuendo on the dance floor – the ship’s rocking is no excuse for being handsy.
6. Sloth – Cabin Chaos and Hygiene Neglect
Cruising is the ultimate lazy holiday – no cooking, no cleaning, and nothing on your to-do list.
But some take that as permission to live like teenagers left alone for the weekend. Leaving your cabin looking like a laundry bomb went off, ignoring basic hygiene, or refusing to clear up after yourself in shared spaces affects the whole ship.
And seriously – wash your hands. With real soap. Every time.
Honourable mentions
Dumping your plates and cups wherever you last sat – nobody wants to see your half-eaten burger left on a pool lounger.
Leaving wet towels and clothes everywhere in your cabin – your steward is not your personal laundry fairy.
Skipping handwashing at every opportunity – those sanitiser stations aren’t decorative.
7. Wrath – The Angry Guest
Everyone’s allowed a grumble now and then. But there’s a difference between giving polite feedback and full-on cruise rage.
Some passengers turn minor issues – like a missing towel animal or lukewarm soup – into front-page scandals.
Worse are those who yell at the crew over things they can’t control, like slow service or port changes.
Being unpleasant doesn’t get problems solved faster. It just ruins the atmosphere. The crew are human, and most genuinely want to help – so give them a chance to do just that.
Honourable mentions
Throwing a tantrum over dinner reservations – the maître d’ isn’t hiding the good tables out of spite.
Snapping at bar staff for delays – when half the ship ordered cocktails at the same time, maybe it’s not a personal vendetta.
Raising your voice at guest services – they’re not a punching bag for every small inconvenience.
Publicly shaming entertainment staff – didn’t love the magician? Fine. No need to roast him in the atrium like it’s open mic night.
Final Word
A cruise ship may be your temporary floating kingdom, but it’s also a shared space with hundreds, or thousands, of other people.
A bit of self-awareness and courtesy go a long way. Avoid these sins, and your shipmates will thank you – even if they don’t say it out loud.
TODAY’S BEST CRUISE DEALS!
Don’t miss these offers…
Related Posts
If you found this interesting, please share!
Jenni Fielding is the founder of Cruise Mummy. She has worked in the cruise industry since 2015 and has taken over 30 cruises. Now, she helps over 1 million people per month to plan their perfect cruise holidays.
